Gooood-a in Buda, and the Best of Pest

We’ve just boarded our train to Vienna after a busy few days in Buda and Pest. They’re actually two separate cities and Pest is pronounced “Pesh.” Clearly, we learned a lot while we were there.

After a 7 hour train ride from Praha, we jumped into a taxi to drive up the Hilton Budapest. We were a little bummed out because it was raining, but luckily I had just purchased a cute, new raincoat before we left so it wasn’t too much of a catastrophe. We were surprised to find that our hotel was up a gigantic hill. (I think they should rename the hotel the Hill-ton but that’s just me.) I mean, there were stairs cutting through the middle but it sort of seemed like we were going to waste most of the short time we had in these cities trekking up and down it. Once we got to our rooms though, we definitely saw the perks of being atop a baby mountain – the view was incredible, even in the rainy weather. We were looking out right across the river at the famous Parliament building. I must have literally 1000 pictures of the view from every angle in Buda, and while none of them could quite capture the beauty of looking at it in really life, there has to be at least one that comes fairly close.

We dropped off our stuff and decided to head out for some lunch, as we were all pretty hungry from a busy day of doing nothing on the train. We had made some friends on the train, or rather, some people came into the compartment car we were sitting in on the train and kicked Dad out because they had three of the six seats reserved, and then they started talking to us. They gave us a bunch of advice and recommendations, a piece of which was that Buda is much more expensive and residential and made Pest sound overall like the place to be. Once we had seen our view, we were pretty sure they were wrong, plus we were dissuaded from making the journey to the center of the cities because of the rain, so we settled for a restaurant right near the hotel, even though it might cost a little more money.

I got a Hungarian fish soup, allegedly made from fish out the Danube. It was pretty good, but it had skin on it which I try to avoid so it was a bit of a challenge to navigate. We paired our food with the local Hungarian beer, Dreher, which was actually very good. In fact, Mom herself was a big fan, something which rarely happens when it comes to beer. It was at lunch where we had our first of many experiences with Hungarian service. Now, it might be because we’re Americans, or a cultural thing, or just that we encountered a few people who shouldn’t have ended up in the service industry, but some of our waiters we not at all personable. Dad began referring to these waiters as Als (after Al Bundy), which I have a feeling would have made them even grumpier had they gotten the reference.

Nothing perks up my spirit like a good meal and some beer, so I was rejuvenated and inspired to explore a bit, even with the crummy weather. We walked around the Buda area and made our way towards the beautiful National Gallery, which houses a lot of 19^th and 20^th century Hungarian art inside. The building was once the famous Buda castle. It seemed the perfect museum day, but obviously it’s closed on Mondays. Typical. Anyway, the benefit of walking around on a day with a drizzle is that there are no other tourists around trying to take pictures in front of the monuments and buildings and views you want pictures of and with. Since I had brought my camera along (you never know when a Kodak moment is going to sneak up on you!), we got some great photos in the rain. The rain even stopped as we were taking pictures, and what’s more, we found two alternative routes down to the bridge! Things were looking up. The original stairs cutting down one side of the hill, as recommended by our taxi driver headed back down to the white bridge – I really liked that all of the bridges connecting Buda and Pest were different from each other – which didn’t seem to be all that pedestrian friendly, implying that we would still have to walk all the way back around to the Chain Bridge (with its clearly defined pedestrian/bike path) to get across. This sounded arduous. During our rain exploration we discovered a pathway that led right to the Chain Bridge and a cable car that did the same! Great success.

Feeling better and better as the day wore on, we retired back to the Hilton to check out the Executive Lounge. Now, this hotel seemed fancier in almost all respects than the Hilton Prauge Old Town, so we weren’t totally sure what to expect. Frankly, I liked the first Exec Lounge better. I felt slightly underdressed as it was filled with actual business people doing actual business, and it didn’t even have any normal water – the still water was flavored so it tasted like flat seltzer aka the worst. Although some of the staff was very helpful (they gave us dinner recommendations the first night), we also felt they were reeeeal judgy over the fact that we came to the lounge after getting back from a day of adventuring, before heading out for dinner, and after eating…okay, perhaps it was excessive, but still.

They recommended a restaurant called 21 for dinner, conveniently located right down the street. As we wanted to save Pest for the next day anyway, this seemed a great choice. I ordered a rosé because I was feeling fancy. I was very surprised, and somewhat torn as to whether or not to drink it, when it arrived and the glass had “Chapel Hill” painted onto it. Strange, but true. I ordered a chicken crepe in some sort of sauce which was delicious. In attempting to figure out the menu, we started talking to the people sitting next to us. It turned out that a young man and his grandfather were on a twelve day trip driving from place to place – it was a tradition they had for some time and seemed adorable and fun. Although Grandpa was a little hard of hearing, he was very nice. The younger guy did something in computers so he and Sean had a lot to talk about, and Grandpa started talking to Mom about his life, wife, and how he could persuade his grandson to cut his hair – he thought the long locks on a 27 year old probably gave off the wrong impression, and he was probably right because the grandson was really nice and smart, etc. – and Dad was talking some about business, some about healthcare, and all sorts of other random things. I didn’t have a lot to contribute to most of the topics so I spent most of the meal deciding whether or not I had judged the grandson because of his hair (I had), and whether or not I had changed that opinion nearly immediately when I realized he was British (also true). I also tried to figure out how people could make one little glass of rosé last the entirety of a meal and made a mental note to start sneaking water in with me in my purse. The biggest highlight was likely the bit I overheard about how there was allegedly some old King’s mummified hand from the 15^th century in one of the churches. I was hoping we would stumble upon it during our stay – maybe we would even run into these new friends there since it was something the grandson was hoping to take Grandpa to see. Overall, it was a great meal.

We turned in for an early night, eager to get a good start the next morning. I had my walking tours to guide us, but had a bit more difficulty navigating the map the hotel had given us as there were no English translations of the landmarks. We made our way down our newly discovered path. After making only one wrong turn, we found ourselves in front of the Chain Bridge. We were impressed with how quickly the Danube flowed as we crossed over No Man’s Land between Buda and Pest. After successfully making it to the other side, and nearly being run over more than once when crossing the street, we decided to head straight to the impressive Parliament building we’d been admiring from our windows (using only appropriately marked crosswalks). I taught my mini history lessons about the statues surrounding the building to no one as the rest of the family meandered through with no particular direction or knowledge of who was who. (I guess they felt my two to three sentence blurb about each of them wouldn’t have done much to clarify.) We found our way to the back of a line and got into it. As a recent college graduate I know that whenever you see a line, it’s best to get in it and send a scout out to figure out what it’s for rather than waste your time figuring it out before holding a spot. It turns out it was the line to purchase tickets for the tour. The next tour wasn’t starting until 12 and it was only about 1030, so we stepped off (the now much longer) line and promised to come back the next day to see it. (Never made it back – oops.)

I had one more Pest tour from NatGeo, but I was yet unable to locate any of the landmarks from it on our map, so we instead tried to follow the advice of our train friends and head towards the famous “Vaci Utca.” Vaci Utca is a pedestrian street filled with a bunch of shops, restaurants, and bars, and as we were feeling a bit lacking in the shopping department we thought this was a great way to start off our afternoon. On our way to Vaci, we stumbled upon St. Stephen’s Basilica, only to realize that this is the church with the hand in it! Dreams really do come true. We stepped inside and had a look around. It had incredibly high ceilings and was truly beautiful. The hand on the other hand (HAHA), was pretty whatever. You couldn’t really see it. To add to the disappointment, we didn’t even run into Gramps there! Sad times. Luckily, we were able to go to the top (via elevator, woo!) and check out a panoramic view of Budapest. It was pretty windy but very impressive.

We made our way to Vaci Utca to find that it was mostly stores like H&M and Zara and Mango. Don’t get me wrong, I love all of those stores (actually, Mango I could do without), but we were hoping for something a little more…Hungarian. It was a beautiful street though and we stopped to find something for lunch. We actually ended up at an Italian restaurant and got some pizza and beer. The pizza was actually really good. We had another Al Bundy waiter, so we didn’t think he was a great person to ask about our course of action for the rest of the day. We spent lunch making a gameplan and had decided on a general itinerary for next day. We headed back to Buda for the afternoon, taking the cable car up. Mom was not excited about it, but Sean, Dad, and I found it to be pretty cool. We went to the National Gallery which housed some pretty neat exhibits. We somehow got into the temporary modern art exhibit even though we didn’t have a ticket for it – I’m glad we did as it was likely my favorite part of the museum. The one piece I didn’t get (okay, I didn’t get a lot of them, but the one piece I really didn’t get) was literally a giant piece of rock. Perhaps the artist is saying Hungary Rocks? Unclear.

My goal for the afternoon was to go to Ruszworm, a famous pastry shop and coffee house that was right around the corner from the hotel that had been around since 1827. We stopped back in the lounge to plan dinner and the next morning, but made sure to head back out before my beloved pastry shop closed. (This is why I belong to the super fat – see entries on China for more details on my pending obesity.) Dad got some homemade ice cream, I got a crème puff, and Sean got some deceptive chocolate cake that had some stowaway fruit hiding in it. Everything (except for the weird fruit) was incredible!  Mom weirdly didn’t feel like a pre-dinner dessert was appropriate so she meandered around and looked at some of the local touristy souvenir shops. We had wanted to swing by the St. Matthias church that was literally next door to the hotel, but it was closed by the time we got back. I have no regrets about my choice. We took a gander at the catacombs under the hotel (it was built around the remains of a 12^th or 13^th century church) and then got ourselves ready for dinner.

We decided we wanted to do dinner on the Danube, and so we headed to the Columbus boat to enjoy a meal out on the river. We were overlooking the bridge, gallery, and Parliament, and were there right at sunset, so we really couldn’t have asked for anything better! The only downside was that there were some spiders hanging out on the railing right next to my chair, so I sometimes had trouble maintaining my focus on anything else. The food was incredible. Mom and I split a spring vegetables salad with feta cheese and bacon and a hake fish in some sort of sauce with shrimp and potatoes. Sooooo good. Sean got feta and red pepper stuffed chicken with rice and Dad got some beef in a pepper sauce. It was a great meal all around! Feeling fully stuffed, we made our way back up the hill and to bed.

Yesterday was our last full day in Budapest, and armed with my maps and guides, I intended to make it a full one. We had researched some flea markets – Budapest is apparently known for them – and found one the coincided with the end of one of my walking tours. Could it be more perfect? We also found where the New York Café was on the map, and the famous Turkish baths. They conveniently made a sort of rectangle starting at the Chain Bridge, so it seemed pretty doable. We walked down Andrassy Ut, the super fancy street of Pest. We saw the “Broadway district,” some fancy stores, the famous Opera House, and more! Our walk ended in Hero’s Square, which is essentially what it sounds like – a big square filled with statues of National Heroes. Behind the square is City Park, which had a couple of key points we wanted to hit – a castle, and the flea market. We wandered around and found some stands but were really disappointed. It just didn’t seem like a “flea market.” We looked up the market one more time, only to discover that it’s only there on weekends. Bummer #1. We then made our way to the castle, diligently following the signs, only to find that we were, in fact, going towards the agriculture museum that happened to be housed in something that looks like a castle. Bummer #2. I was feeling like a failure (a feeling which I reeeeeeeeeally don’t like) as we headed out of the park and back on our way to civilization. (We were off the map at this point.) Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted something familiar – it was the logo of my future company! We walked over and found the Budapest office, so the walk seemed worth it after all. Dad and I took some pictures in front of it as in just a few weeks we will officially (once again, since I interned there last summer) be colleagues there.

Feeling good again, we started heading towards the New York Café. I know what you’ve been thinking since the first time you read the name – really? New York Café? You’re from New York. Get a little cultural competence, will you? This place, however, was recommended by our well-traveled friends on the train, as well as by our taxi driver, and it was even labeled as a must see on Mom’s map that she’d acquired from a random person trying to persuade her to take a tour or something, so we thought it would be a good stop to make. We were getting really hungry on our way, and since the Café is really known for its coffee, we decided to stop for lunch first and then head to the café later for a drink. As we were a bit off the beaten path, we were having some trouble finding something to eat. Once we found a restaurant with an outdoor patio we were happy with, we realized it was a Mexican restaurant! Leave it to the Pages to find one in Budapest. I don’t think we’ve ever been on vacation without getting Mexican, and I’m glad that we didn’t break tradition here.

We excitedly sat down and decided what to order to drink. Since even Mom wanted beer, we decided to be economical and go for the “beer giraffe.” Sean and Dad thought it was a typo but I stand by my thought that it was no misnomer – it was one of those beer towers and I think it bears a resemblance to a giraffe’s neck more than anything else. We got a lot of double- and triple-takes from people passing by on the street. I think we really upheld the American image of drinking in large quantities at somewhat inappropriate times. Regardless, we also ordered some tacos which were a little weird but actually pretty good, and continued on our way.

It turned out that the ornate, self-proclaimed “Most Beautiful Café in the World” was a mere 15 minute walk away, so we perused some nearby stores before settling in for coffee at New York Café. It was in the lobby of some fancy hotel and I really don’t think they were exaggerating with the aforementioned claim. It had painted ceilings, beautiful chandeliers, pretty chairs and everything else you can imagine. When I say we got “coffee,” I mean we got dessert that had a hint of coffee in it. Dad and I got Iced Coffee with Crème Brulee flavor and Vanilla Ice Cream, Mom got the same without the flavor, and Sean got a Moroccan coffee. My fullness was irrelevant as this was innnnnncredible. I’m so glad we went and wish they actually had a New York Café in New York.

Our next and final stop of the afternoon was the famous Turkish Baths. I had clearly labeled them on my map and we got to the location only to find that they weren’t there. It turns out my source (Mom’s random map from the guy) or my transferring abilities fell far short, as the baths were back in the park where we first started. I was saooooooooooooooo mad. In fact, I’m mad just thinking about it right now. The lesson here is always triple check. Bummer #3.I brooded for a little, but didn’t let it bring me down for too long.

We headed back up to Buda to do some souvenir shopping (since we had no flea market) and see some other remains (you know, your classic 13^th and 14^th century church remains, etc.). We had a drink in the famous Fisherman’s Bastion, overlooking the bridge and Parliament and found a place for dinner. We didn’t find anything particularly great in the souvenir department, which was a letdown but we realized (when we were about the pay the bill for dinner) that they only accepted cash so we ended up being able to get rid of our remaining Hungarian bills anyway.

We watched a bit of the Spain vs. Portugal game (viva España!), but got a little bored after 70 min of 0-0 so Sean and I found this weird Hungarian show that seems to be about a fat piece of Cinnamon Toast Crunch who’s caught in a white abyss of nothingness attempting to get to some lounge. We’re pretty sure it’s propaganda, but we’re not sure what for. We went to bed pretty early so we could catch the train we’re currently on to Vienna. It’s nicer than our last train – they’ve already given us a free Kit Kat – so we’re pretty sure it’s going to be an easy ride. Although it’s sad that we’re already headed towards the last leg of our journey, I can’t wait to see what Vienna has in store for us! 

Pages Perusing Pra-ha-ha

Okay, I admit the title’s weak, but aren’t alliterations alluring? (See what I did there?) My (in)ability to come up with jarring titles aside, Prague was incredible. We’re currently on our 7 hour train ride (first class, suuuuuuup) to Budapest and I thought it was the perfect time to reflect on our adventures thus far.

First of all, and perhaps most importantly, I don’t think I’m ever going to be able to settle for non-business class travel again. When I say the plane ride itself was a vacation, I am not hyperbolizing. We were served champagne immediately upon being seated, and enjoyed sipping it as we watched the peons shuffle sadly through to their small seats in the back. I’m usually on the other side of this interaction and in the past have truly felt like a member of the proletariat, but as I sipped my champagne and lounged back in my oversized chair, I began to understand the allure of the bourgeois life. (I thought I’d pepper in some words having to do with European history to make readers believe I’m sophisticated enough to be seating in such a seat as I was.) Once we took off, things only got better. Actually, to be fair, there was a small blip – Mom’s TV wasn’t working. I felt bad as it was definitely my fault since I perpetually have bad luck with these things (like that time I went to Madrid or that time I went to China), but we hardly even noticed since the seats lounged back nearly entirely horizontally so sleeping was a legitimate option. We enjoyed our delicious and classy meal, complete with free drinks and desserts, and then laid back to try to get some sleep. Just kidding, we slept like babies until breakfast. It was the best. After a delicious breakfast, I had just enough time to review my information about Prague before we landed.

From the airport, we had to find our way to the hotel. Being in charge of transportation and lodging (“my responsibility ended when I booked the train tickets”), Dad had our bus all figured out. Likely Prague’s parallel of Triangle Transit, the Airport Express was hardly as glamorous as it sounded. It was hot and it was packed. The upside was that we were able to snag a seat, but the downside was that as a result, we ended up with people’s butts in our faces. We made a game-time decision to get off at a different stop than intended, and luckily, as opposed to that time I tried that in Ireland, it worked out perfectly.

We checked in at the Hilton Old Town Prague with no problems and headed up to check out our rooms. We were on the “executive floor” which meant we had access to the swanky executive lounge. I enjoy a swanky lounge as much as the next gal, so, after dropping off our bags, we went to go explore. As we relaxed over some complementary snacks and drinks, we decided that this was a place we would be spending a lot of time. Dad had acquired a map, on which I drew in all of my walking tours (love NatGeo.) We were conveniently located right outside of Old Town, mere steps from the beginning of my first tour. We changed out of our plane clothes and began tour number one.

Sadly, the family was not as interested in my informed commentary on all of our stops as I was, but at least they were willing to follow my path. We started at the Municipal House (a concert hall), and walk under the Powder Tower to officially enter into old town. We headed down to the square and began to truly feel the “old town charm.” It was cobblestoned and had an impressive-looking clock tower in the center, with a big church (Church of Our Lady Before Tyne) across the way. We decided to climb up the clock tower (the first of many stairs we would tackle) to get a better view. After snapping a few pictures (I’m all about Kodak moments), we headed back down 10 minutes to the hour.

According to my walking tour (which I treated like our Bible), the astronomical clock which strikes on the hour is a pretty impressive spectacle to watch. As it was close, we decided to find our spot among the people lining up to see, and Czech out (my jokes get better and better, don’t they? And more original!) what all the fuss was over. Mom and Sean were getting antsy and didn’t want to stay, but as the clock struck 3 we were all happy to be there. There was a fun little skeleton guy who rang the bell as various religious figures poked their heads out of the upper window to wave hello. There were a bunch of mechanisms on the clock which changed, and to top it off, and (real) guy with a trumpet popped out of the top to play us a little tune when the mechanical stuff ended.

Happy to have checked it off of our list so early in our Prague adventure, we meandered through the square to find ourselves some lunch. We found ourselves a nice little restaurant, and settled in for a quick bite. We quickly discovered that soda and beer cost the same amount, and all decided to go for the latter except for Mom. Mom’s soda came out with no ice (as is the norm around here). She politely asked for some more only to have the waitress touch the glass and affirm “what? It’s cold,” before glaring at her and going to get some ice from the back. I was a little nervous she was going to spit in our food, but everything came out looking tasty. I got an asparagus soup which I really enjoyed. The food seems to be pretty cheaply priced here, which makes sense as it’s 20 czech korums to one USD.

After recovering from the ice incident, we continued our trek to the famous Charles Bridge. We had all heard about it, but until you see it yourself, it’s pretty difficult to understand how magnificent it is. It’s a pedestrian bridge with giant statues lining its edges overlooking a beautiful river. We crossed over and found ourselves right near the Kafka museum and decided to see what it had to offer. I have personally only read a couple of his stories so felt a little underprepared but was excited nonetheless. Right outside the museum we stumbled upon a fun statue of two guys peeing into the pool in which they were standing (complete with full hip rotation!) As we were chuckling over the statue (because we’re immature Americans who have no appreciation for deeper meanings), we conveniently overheard a small tour coming through who happened to be speaking English. Apparently the two guys represent government officials and the pool they’re peeing into is shaped like the Czech Republic. So deep. 

Tee-hee

Feeling more sophisticated already, we headed into the museum to continue to expand our cultural knowledge. It was really cool – a large part of the museum was essentially physical representations of some of the crazy ideas in Kafka’s stories (i.e. an office that seems never to end). I wish I had studied up beforehand, but equipped with my photos, I’ll now have better mental images should I ever decide to read more Kafka.

By this point, it was getting to be dinner time, so we stopped at a beautiful bar on the river for a beer and then headed back to the hotel. We went back to the Executive Lounge (as I mentioned, it would soon become our second home) before dinner. The staff in the lounge was incredible. They were all super helpful and made dinner reservations on our behalf every night. (We would walk into restaurants be like “We, uh…have reservations under…room…816?”) The first night we headed around the block to this cool looking restaurant called Celnice (which was a little confusing because the street was also called Celnice) which was definitely a converted something, but we couldn’t tell what. Mom opted for the salad (boring), but Dad, Sean, and I got a couple of things to split – a cheese plate, cornflake covered turkey schnitzel, and some duck. It should come as no surprise that the cornflake covered schnitzel was quite obviously the best. You could actually really taste the flavor of the cornflakes. I loved it. Mom asked for water, which, as per usual in Europe, implied bottled rather than tap water and again, cost as much as the beer. She really was not making great H2O decisions on Day One, but luckily she learned from her mistakes. The lesson of course, is that one should always opt for beer. After topping off the meal with a delicious dessert (cheesecake covered in Bailey’s anyone?) and heading back to the Executive Lounge one last time, we turned in for a good night’s sleep.

The next morning, we were feeling pretty ambitious and were hoping to combine and complete my two remaining walking tours into one mega-tour. Guess where we went for breakfast? The staff at the lounge in the morning was just as helpful (and perky) as in the evening; the highlight was likely when the somewhat overeager staff member running the lounge in the morning was clarifying Sean’s request for water. “Still?” he asked, referring to the fact that Sean might want carbonated water instead. Sean gave him a look and answered “yea” in a somewhat annoyed tone, asserting the idea that his mind had not changed from ten seconds prior and he did still want water. We truly couldn’t be classier if we tried.

As I mentioned, we had big plans to see gardens and the castle and more, so we rallied and made our way out of the hotel. We decided to make our way over a different bridge so that we could see the Charles and the river all at once and snag some awesome pictures. We crossed a place which dropped us off conveniently around where Walking Tour #2 began. It was mostly gardens so we decided to pick a couple that sounded intriguing and hit those. We started with the one my tour told me was the Palace Garden, only to find that it was the Wallenstein Garden, which the tour told me was on the other side of the street and down a ways. WHY WOULD YOU LIE TO ME NATGEO? I TRUSTED YOU. Clearly, I was a bit distraught over the fact that the thing I had printed off of the internet for free was not 100% correct, but somehow we trudged on. The Wallenstein Gardens were actually really neat, and surrounded the building which is now used for Congress. We came out and headed towards the palace.

Classy Congress

We picked up the first walking tour where we had left off yesterday, in the Lesser Quarter Square. Although a seemingly rude name, it did seem sort of appropriate when one compared this square with the excitement and beauty of Old Town Square. It wasn’t even a pedestrian square – we were subjected to the mercy of the little green man. In Prague, the little green man who indicates it’s appropriate to cross is accompanied by a nerve-wracking, quick-paced clicking noise. It lasts for a short time, and my heartbeat tends to accelerate to keep up with the clicks so I found myself sprinting across in a nervous hurry. Personal neuroses aside, the highlight of the square was definitely St. Nicholas Church. Our love affair with stairs continued as we made the trek up to the top to take a look out to see some impressive, panoramic views of the city. Interestingly, the church also seconded as a spy station for the secret police, so we got to climb further up to the top to see some old spy gear and see where the spies would live and work. Overall, it was pretty cool.

On our way back down we discovered Mom’s ineptitude when it comes to lots of spiral stairs. To be fair, even though she’s scared, she’s willing and able to do them, but we were waiting a solid ten minutes for her at the bottom. I had enough time to figure out how best to get to the palace. We headed down Nerudova, “one of the handsomest streets in the Lesser Quarter,” to stop for a quick bite before climbing up to the castle. We popped into souvenir shops along the way but were overall pretty unimpressed. Mom and I split a spinach and cheese crepe for lunch, and we all tried the local beer. We were commenting on the how cool all of the glasses we’ve seen were, and Dad asked the waitress where we could buy ones like it. She said they get them directly from the brewery and they couldn’t sell them so Dad (somewhat) jokingly asked if he could steal one. She said something to the effect of “I won’t be looking” so we took that as implicit permission to snag one of the awesome glasses. Feeling like champs, we headed up to the Palace for a royal afternoon.

A long flight of stairs led us to the main gate of the castle. My disenchantment with the tours continued when I discovered there was a ramp we could have walked up instead nearby, but at least we were at the right place. We conveniently arrived right at the time of the changing of the guard which was exciting to see. We entered through the main gate and found our way to the palace’s first attraction, St. Vitus Cathedral. It was gigantic and had beautiful stained glass windows. Mom went as far as to say it was prettier than Duke Chapel – I begged to differ, but I might be a little biased. After exploring that part of the cathedral you’re able to see for free, we headed into the main palace. We bought a combined ticket for the majority of the sights to be explored on the grounds and began, as I mentioned, with the Royal Palace itself. It was neat to see, but mostly for architecture of the rooms themselves since most of the furniture was no actually there. My favorite room was one that had all of the crests of the royal families painted on the walls. It made me want a crest of my own. I guess I’ll just have to marry into royalty, since they’re probably the only people who still keep track of such things…

I mean, I guess it’s fine.

Get at me if you have one.

After the palace we continued onto St. George’s Basilica. It was a lot less ornate than St. Vitus and much more solemn. It is apparently “one of the few Romanesque buildings in Prague still standing,” but who knows if I could even trust my walking tours anymore? Continuing on from the basilica, we made our way to the Golden Lane. This was the area where all of the servants and marksmen lived, so I was a little thrown off by the name. We climbed up some narrow stairs and walked down a hall filled with all sorts of cool, old armor. My favorite was the one I affectionately dubbed “birdman,” as it literally looked like armor for big bird (complete with bird face and feet). On our way down the hallway, we spotted a stand where you could “try out a crossbow.” Obviously, Sean was eager to partake. Playing with a crossbow sure draws a crowd. Lots of people gathered to see him shoot a bull’s-eye, right in the middle. He later said that it confirmed his theory that he would have made a great medieval knight; needless to say, the whole family and surrounding crowd were impressed. Having a knack for embarrassing myself in large crowds, Sean’s success persuaded me to give it a try. I was hoping great aim was somehow a family trait. Unfortunately, it was not. I think the crowd mostly stayed out of pity to watch me miss all three times, although a few probably stepped away for fear that I might shoot so far to the left that I’d end up facing backwards and hit them. I think a large part of the problem was that the crossbow was made for righties and so I couldn’t quite hold it up or line it up in a way that I could gauge where I was shooting. (Okay, maybe not a large part…but it was definitely a contributing factor.) It’s at least reassuring to know that had I lived in the Middle Ages I would have had a brother that could protect me since I clearly could not have protected myself.

Family Protector

“What do you mean this is small? This is bigger than my apt!” – Sean

Once I recovered from my monumental failure, we moved on to what I found to be one of the more interesting parts of the royal grounds – the dungeon. It was a place I would hope never to find myself. There were cages, chains hangings from the wall, and even a sort of bodysuit made of metal hanging over a fire. Apparently the dungeon was renamed after someone who had learned to play the violin while locked up somewhere in here; I assume in one of the aforementioned devices. Before seeing it, I wasn’t all that impressed about that feat, as with enough time anyone could become an expert at anything (10,000 hour rule, amiright?), but after seeing those conditions, I had a newfound appreciation for Mr. Dalibor of the 15^th century.

We made meandered our way back down to the Lesser Quarter from the palace, and stopped for a beer before heading the see the famous Lennon Wall. I was excited to see the beautifully painted peace sign and surrounding lyrics that had popped up when I googled it, but frankly was pretty disappointed with the actual product. My mental picture had been spray painted over with gems like “SOANDSO WUZ HEREEEEEE AND IS SO ORIGINAL BECAUSE HE WRITES THINGZ LIKE IMAGINE WORLD PEACE FOREVER LOVE HEARTZ.” Maybe it wasn’t quite so bad, but I was still underwhelmed.

Whatever, Fred.

We headed back to the hotel via Kampa, a park from one of my walking tours. We found ourselves in the middle of some concert rife with dreadlocks, beer, a google plus tent, and advertisements for “rock for church.” Although I had some questions about how all of these things fit together, I was nonetheless excited about the event and the free wifi that came with it. We crossed another bridge and took a new route back to the hotel.

  

We obviously had happy hour at the exec lounge (I’m so comfortable there I feel I could abbreviate it now) and got another recommendation and reservation for dinner. We were excited for some real Czech food; Mom, Dad, and I got Goulash in a bread bowl. It was soooo good. As Dad is a meat and potatoes type of guy, I was pretty sure that Czech food was right up his alley and was definitely correct in this assumption. Dad and Sean tried the “national drink of Czech land,” some sort of ginger shot (it was gross), and Dad snagged the glass. We’re really terrible people, but I’m okay with it.

Meet Sophisticated Sean, the world’s new favorite meme.

Our goal for the night was to find a jazz club, something Prague is known for. We found one via the recommendation of the waiter at the restaurant, but Dad wasn’t thrilled so we decided to meander towards the river and find another one. We did and we enticed by the red and black walls and promise of some sort of non-traditional jazz, and so we sat down. What we got once the show started was essentially watching my grandmother tripping on drugs with pink hair…but in a good way, mostly. The band consisted of her, a pianist / mandolin player, bassist, and drummer. They were all incredibly talented and other than the occasional screaming and buzzing (unclear), it was pretty cool! Mom was pretty displeased with the first set and would sometimes lament about how we should have stayed at the first, more traditional place, however, she got really into it for the second set, and eventually even came around to the rest of the family’s conclusion that the woman on stage was in fact the Czech (and as I mentioned, somewhat high) version of her mother. We headed back to the hotel and (since the exec lounge was closed – we’re so fun that we stay out late) got a drink at the real hotel bar, eavesdropped on a conversation between a man and the 72 year old woman he was hitting on while her husband sat and played on his iPad.

Don’t let the pink hair fool you – she’s definitely over 70

As we had covered the walking tours, we decided to take a day trip on our last day in Prague. I was trying to find something fun to do and decided to look up where the brewery was for the delicious Czech beer that was everywhere, Pilsner Urquell was. It was mere hour and half train ride away! We had breakfast and then headed to the train station – it’s the same station we left out of this morning so it was a good practice run. The train ride went smoothly (in compartment cars, just like Florence except with fewer inappropriate Mi Scuzzi jokes) and we got to Plzen right around 11:45. As everything I saw online said the brewery is right in the city center, I didn’t bother to look up explicit directions on how to get there. This was probably a mistake as when we got out of the train station there was no obvious indication as to where the center of town was. Mom interrupted a police man in the process of writing someone up for a ticket and asked for directions. Luckily, she didn’t get shot and we were on our way. We followed what we thought were his directions and ended up at some abandoned bar…oops? Maybe that was his subtle way of telling us it’s inappropriate to interrupt. I started to get a little nervous when we continued wandering around and found everything was closed (as it was Sunday) so there was no one we could really ask. As we made our way back to the train station to see what was on the other side of it (getting closer and closer to the 1245 start time of the tour), we saw a hotel across the street and decided to ask there. Turns out we were just one street off and adorable little town was waiting for us right across the way!

Pleased to have made it to Plzen

We made it there in time for the tour and were met by our English-speaking guide, Tereza. She was nice, funny, and informative. What more could one want from a guide? It was reminiscent of when I toured the Guinness factory in Ireland, only this time we got to see the process actually happening rather than just learning about it. It was impressive to see – especially the production line for processing and bottling, and we even got to have a large glass of unfiltered Pilsner Urquell at the end. Next, we headed to the only restaurant in town for lunch. It’s interesting because it seems like the entire town was built around the brewery. Lunch was pretty good – I got broccoli in a cheese sauce with some bread, Sean got a bratwurst and Mom and Dad got some soups. We finished up, and then headed to the gift shop where we got a couple of exciting things before heading back to the train station.

As we relaxed in the lounge we tried to find a place for dinner. I wanted to go to a restaurant Elleana had recommended but it unfortunately closed pretty early so we weren’t going to make it. We went instead to a restaurant Mom’s friend’s cousin (all about networking) recommended. She actually recommended the rooftop part, so we booked that for dessert and ate inside for dinner. It was soooo good! Sean and I split a salmon dish and a shrimp dish, but Dad’s steak and Mom’s pasta were really tasty too. We had some time to kill between dinner and dessert so did one last walkthrough of the square. We got back to the restaurant about 15 minutes early but they took us anyway. The view was worth the wait. It looked out over the square on one side and the palace on the other. The dessert was phenomenal. (Ice cream – duh.) We heard the excited cheers of people watching the quarterfinal match of the Eurocup in the square, and took in some last views of Prague before heading back to the hotel. We’ve already had a wonderful trip, but I’m excited for our journey to continue in Budapest!

Back to the East (but this time, in style)

My family and I are of the general philosophy that warmth + beach + book + drink = ideal vacation. This formula has never failed us in the past, however, we decided it was time to tweak it, if only for the next week and a half. Why? Well, with my brother and I both being officially done with college (Sean had to wait a whole year for me – sometimes it sucks to be the oldest, huh?) we thought we needed something momentous. In about 2 hours, we’ll be heading off to Prague, Vienna, and Budapest to see what Eastern Europe has to offer.

None of us has ever been to any of these places, and we don’t have a solidified plan. I was in charge of making some sort of loose itinerary…and I have a fairly lengthy list of things I (I mean “we”) want to see, but a lot of this trip is still up in the air. I’m hoping to funnel down to some “must sees” while we’re still up in the air later tonight, but we’ll see how it goes…

The beautiful thing about traveling with my family is that there is a much smaller probability that any of the hotels we’re staying at will have blatant advertisements for “Lady of the Evening” in the elevator, and I’m sure I’ll sleep easier on the plane with the free alcohol I definitely plan to take advantage of. I’m very excited to see how my family works on a “doing” vacation, and hope the things I googled, the book my Dad has, and just meandering around will all magically blend together to create an unforgettable vacation!

“I dumpling you Chinese, you dumpling me English” – The last of friends, food, and fun in China

I never thought I'd say this but Lauren's really popular. She's introduced me to more people in China than friends I have at home. Luckily for me, some of them speak English, and unfortunately for her, some of them don't, leaving her to be constantly translating and acting as a constant middleman. In the past two days we've done a bit of Shanghai on our own, met up with a lot of her friends for meals and adventures, and even made some new friends!

Yesterday was our day to "finish Shanghai." We began our morning at the famous Yu Yuan – the area is full of a bunch of touristy shopping streets as well as a beautiful rock garden. We found our way to the back, local streets to get some good breakfast – we were in the mood for an ooey gooey delicious heart attack, and knew the locals would be sure to have a cart selling some. We were so excited when we stumbled into one that we were not paying attention quickly enough to stop the "chef" from adulterating it with ketchup and mayo. It was downright blasphemous and turned the whole experience (i.e. the one bite we took before we threw it out) into more of an ewwy gooey. As much as that joke made me feel a little better, it still brought me down a notch, because as this blog has surely proved, I'm all about the food. We decided that purchasing a bubble tea might perk us up and so we went for round two at Coco. This time, I went for my go-to at home flavoring of choice, caramel, and it was obviously a hit. We explored the garden for awhile – it was pretty serene even though there were a lot of people moving through. We met an old man and his young, American grandson and had trouble deciding which of them was more adorable. We took some fun pictures (obvi) and then decided we had exhausted all Yu Yuan had to offer.

We made some moves to ones of the places I had heard the most about from Lauren during her previous Shanghai experiences – the cheap market. I did really well, and continue to be excited by my purchases. I weirdly enough seem to have no buyer's remorse in this country and just feel better and better about what I buy as time goes on. I wonder how I'll feel tomorrow when I unpack and discover all of the things I bought…oh, well. Sunk costs, amiright?

After the market, we were feeling pretty hungry, so after heading back to the hotel quickly to drop off our goods, we went off to Fudan to explore some of Lauren's old haunts. Ever popular, we ran into the "bike guy," from whom she bought a bike in the middle of the street (to be picked up later in the week…casual), the rice dumpling lady, from whom we bought a rice dumpling, and a member of the ooey gooey delicious heart attack family, from whom we bought a much, much, much better OGDH.

With our hunger satisfied, Lauren took me on a tour of campus! I saw the Wash U classroom, her old dorm, her favorite study spots, the gift shop, and the giant Mao statue in the middle of campus. It further supports my suspicion that China is always watching. We hung out for awhile on the quad as we waited for Lauren's old roommates, Lina and Jisu, for dinner (number one…we met up with more friends for dinner number 2 later. Oops?) She really lucked out in the roommate department – they were really sweet! We went to a pretty mediocre Taiwanese restaurant which was in a nice area of town. Luckily, we only got a little bit of food. We also got Lauren's favorite crème puff (we had to – it was the official one on the list and had to be compared to the one we tried in Guilin) for dessert, a Bearded Papa. Well worth it.

We said our goodbyes, and then had about an hour to kill until the foot massage I promised Lauren I'd get with her. We walked around by her gym where she showed me another one of her favorite study locations, and we ran into more random dance parties. (That's right – parties, as in more than one.) I was nervous, but excited when we headed back to the massage place.

As I previously mentioned, I'm really squeamish about people touching my feet. I'm really embarrassing to get pedicures with (just ask my mom) and was pretty sure I would be unable to sit through an entire hour of someone essentially tickling my feet, but Lauren assured me I would be fine…she was wrong. Luckily, we were in a private room, and Lauren and her masseuse are friends so the only person I was really offending was my masseuse but I just could not handle it. There was frankly nowhere for the experience to go but downhill when he looked at my feet and insisted I let him get all of the calluses off because they were so gross from running and wearing flip flops a lot. I was literally crying from laughing so hard when he actually started massaging my feet that he ended up stopping early and switching to a back and shoulder massage – I feel like this was mostly a strategic maneuver to shut me up, rather than for my comfort. He claims that it's just because it's my first time, and I'll let him believe that, but to be honest, it seems likely that this was also my last time.

Having successfully embarrassed myself in a foreign country, I was ready for dinner number 2. We met with Lauren's friends who work at the gym and headed towards Fudan for a bite to eat. It was really a struggle to communicate as my Chinese is horrific and their English is not all that much better. Whenever Lauren had a phone call (which happened more than once), we all just sort of looked at each other. We got some noodles and dumplings (but the dumplings were the worst – not our best food day), but her friends didn't eat and then decided they wanted KFC so we went there as well. I was telling one of her friends to teach me Chinese, and he tried to say he would teach me Chinese and I could teach him English, but when he asked Lauren to remind him of how to say "teach," Lauren misheard and thought he had asked her to translate the Chinese word for "dumpling" instead, which is how I ended up with the lovely offer that has become the title of this post. Probably the most interesting part of the evening was when they got super excited by the idea that America has erasable pens. To be fair, I was pretty excited when I first heard about them too, but once I realized I would end up with ink all over my hand because I'm a lefty, and how crossing something out can sometimes (always) be fairly cathartic, I got over them. I'm excited to send them some when I get home – hopefully they don't find them to be too much of a let-down. We left KFC (glad I got to really experience "China" with her real Chinese friends) and headed back to our hotel.

We woke up this morning with some time to kill before meeting up with Lauren's other friend (are you losing count? I certainly am.) who was going to take us to a water town for the afternoon. We decided to spend our time meandering towards and through People's Park (which we hadn't made it to yet) until our arranged meeting time.  We finally made it there, and were just beginning to walk through, when some girls stopped us and asked us to take a picture of them. They were both impressed with Lauren's Chinese and also all pretty good at English, so they began to talk to us. We were comparing cultures, talking about our respective trips, etc. and they eventually asked us to join them for some tea history and culture event they were heading to. Why not? We thought, and off we went with our new friends.

The girl I was talking to, Bessie, told me a pretty interesting fact on the way to the event – apparently, a lot of Chinese superstars get plastic surgery to make their noses bigger. Strange, but true. We made it over to the event which turned out to be a private room with a private server who was going to teach us about the history of tea and allow us to try some. We looked at the menu and it seemed like it was going to cost us 30 yuan (~5 bucks) to see what she had to offer, so we decided we were in. We learned about the proper way to drink tea (it's different for guys and girls), and learned about the tea god – we rubbed him in different places for luck, money, and love. The girls were all strangely curious about my love life and made sure I rubbed the god right in the middle for a boyfriend. We started with a ginseng tea, which left a surprisingly sweet taste on the tongue after drinking it. It was really good! After the ginseng, we moved onto a jasmine tea. The woman presenting to us explained that jasmine leaves can be put under eyes to reduce bags. When I excitedly told the girls that I always complain about bags under my eyes, Bessie joked that I was likely an insomniac waiting up all night worrying about Mr. Right…it's like she could read my mind. The tea, of course was delicious. It wasn't until the third tea, and deliciously strong and sweet fruit tea, that Lauren and I realized we were being charged lots of money (~50 yuan, with the price only going up as we moved on) per sample. OOOOOOPS. We told them that we didn't want to keep going, but still ended up spending a pretty penny (almost 200 yuan or about $30) with our new friends. Luckily, we were able to try more of each tea and so we did our best to get our money's worth. Dazzy, one of the other girls, also bought us each one of the more expensive teas we weren't able to afford trying which was so sweet of her! Another bonus was that we all got good luck charms at the end. "Our foreign friends" got to pick first, so I obviously chose the Duke blue one. It wasn't until after choosing that I was informed that this is the one that represents love, which they all continued to find hilarious. After all of the meanings were shared, Dan Dan, the other girl, offered me hers, which meant power. I love me some power, so I was super excited to trade but she assured me I should keep mine because I need it to find a boyfriend, and that she just wanted to give me hers to give me it. Maybe they just wanted me to experience the joy of owning a couple's shirt or keychain? Being Duke blue, it already is representing something I love, so I guess it's already working.

Unfortunately, my power charm broke in half somewhere between leaving the tea house and getting into the taxi to meet up with Lauren's friend, Xixi. I'm hoping that it's one of those things that means it will come true when it falls apart. (You know, like those bracelets? You tie them on and make a wish and when they fall off the wish comes true? I promise it's a thing.) If not, I hope someone else finds it and wields the power wisely.

Xixi is so sweet! We met her at the bus stop – I now think we've taken every form of public transportation. Impressive. She took us to Zhujiajiao. A water town is essentially exactly what it sounds like. It's a neat little escape from the city life, with an ancient feel (this one's over 1700 year's old!) and a lot of water. We walked around for awhile. Xixi was hilarious – she was trying to bargain for anything and everything, including the boat prices and even water. (She was successful in the latter endeavor.) She wouldn't let us buy anything as they would give higher prices to us because we are foreigners. We tried this new snack. I have no idea what it's called and Lauren's asleep, but it was a banana leaf filled with sticky brown rice and some sort of meat. It was interesting to watch it being made. It was really good. As we were doing street food for lunch, we then decided to get some part of a pig (ankle, maybe?) also wrapped in a banana leaf. After one bite, I noticed that mine came free with a dead fly inside – no extra charge! – so I decided I was done after that. (To be fair, I've had street food nearly everyday I've been in this country and this was the first incident so don't judge all for one's mistake!)  We wandered around for awhile – I ended up getting my second and final corn ice cream – and then got back on the bus to head home.

Unfortunately, once we got back to the main city, it started raining. We took a taxi back to the hotel to regroup, and then headed out to meet up with Changhong for dinner. Being my last night in Shanghai, we wanted to make sure we finished out the list of foods I needed to try while I was here. We had two items left, and Changhong was happy to join us in eating them. The first, a spicy bullfrog dish, was delicious. We found it at a Sichuan style restaurant overlooking the city skyline. It was a great meal! We made sure to not order as many dishes as we had at lunch a few days ago, as we didn't want to force poor Changhong to eat every last bite of leftovers we had. After dinner, the only item left on the list was a "bread box." It's a dessert and luckily, the place that served it was in the same mall we found our dinner restaurant at. Now, for the entire trip I had been imagining a "bread box" as a rectangular plastic box with a bunch of little compartment in it, each containing some sort of delicious, sweet, carb-heavy dish. I was wrong. (It happens sometimes.) It was literally a box made out of a sweet bread filled with a bunch of pieces of cut-up sweet bread topped with a scoop of ice cream. Don't be embarrassed if you're drooling – I nearly was too when I saw it.

After dining on the delectable but decadent dessert (alliterations can make or break any piece of prose), we went for a nice long walk along the Bund. It was more clear out tonight than the last time we went so we snagged a few more pictures. As we were doing so, I met a professor from Clemson! I made sure to yell "Go Duke!" as we continued our walk, because I'm obnoxious like that, but overall we had a nice chat. After walking, Lauren and I headed back to our hotel to do some packing. Shanghai was a wonderful experience, largely made by all of the fun and friendly people I met, even those who don't speak the same language as I do!

The past two weeks have been incredible and I'm so glad I had the opportunity to come here. Although I admit I'm not looking forward to the excessive traveling I'll be doing tomorrow, it will be a good time to reflect – the 13 hours of my long flight should provide me ample time to come up with a creative way to share them. Shang-bye for now! 

Sight-seeing and Socializing in Shanghai

We arrived safe and sound in Shanghai yesterday and are staying at the beautiful (and beautifully situated!) Bund Riverside Hotel. We have personal wifi for our room which is very exciting, and have already made friends with the bell hop, Rain, by giving him a nice tip for helping us with our bags. To be fair though, he may or may not have been fired since yesterday as we're yet to see him after he helped Lauren set up her phone by literally leaving work and walking us to the store. (We're pretty sure his boss told him to, but his colleagues seemed pretty confused by it. So many questions.)

We're pretty tired, so I'm going to do my best to be moderately concise in my explanation of our time here so far. As you've likely noticed, brevity is not really my thing, so we'll see how this goes. Highlights:

1.    1. Coco: Coco is Lauren's favorite bubble tea place, and was on our food list. Upon arriving in Shanghai, we needed a little snack to tide us over, and walked through People's Square in a fruitless search for one for more than an hour. We ended up getting a dumpling filled with tofu and spices which sounds weird but was actually delicious. We then immediately stumbled upon Coco after Coco and ended up getting one of those to split. I found it to be pretty whatever, but to be fair, the tapioca balls in bubble teas really freak me out so I was going into the whole experience with a bad attitude. We're hoping to get back to one again before I leave – I'll be going sans bubbles next time.

2.     2. Dinner: We went to Lauren's future apartment for dinner where she'll be living with her friends Andrew and Tracy. They were kind enough to offer to cook us dinner. Their friends Ron, from Canada, and Rambo, from northern China by Russia who chose the best English name ever, were there too. They made a great meal including fish, tofu, potatoes, a couple of vegetable dishes and a lot of beer. Andrew and Tracy are hilarious – we learned all sorts of North Korea jokes, about how the fish should point to the leader, how blood means money, and many other hilarious and exciting things. The apartment is incredible – I'm very jealous that Lauren will be living in such a big apartment in such a great location with such great people! We had a really good time!

3.      3.More fooooooooood – We knocked the famous Shanghai soup-filled dumplings off our list for breakfast this morning. Obviously, they were delicious. We still need to find the steamed version though.

4.     4. The Bund (AM) – The morning, we headed over to the Bund (where the famous Shanghai skyline is) to check it out during the daytime. We have a fairly good view of the Pearl Tower from our hotel room but it was really neat to see it up close(r). Even during the day, it's a pretty impressive skyline, but the real way to see it is at night.

5.     5. Lunch – We met up with another one of Lauren's friends, Chong Hong (Lauren's trying to prove how popular she is here) for lunch. He's super nice and friendly! We went to a fairly fancy restaurant which they had been to before. Lauren knew exactly how to get there which is surprising as her sense of direction is not always 100% - I guess she just followed her nose? We got a ton of food, but were able to knock three more things off of our list: scallops in garlic sauce with glass noodles (ahhhhhsogood), fried buns with condensed milk (incredible, but weird because they were served in the middle of the meal even though they're clearly a dessert-type dish in my mind), and a famous Southern Chinese fish dish (which was made in the best sauce ever). Lauren and I had to tap out of the meal with a lot still left because we were super full, but Chong Hong was having none of it. He said he couldn't stand dishes being left unfinished and proceeded to stuff his skinny body full of nearly everything left on the table. I appreciated his dedication, but was fairly certain he was going to throw up at a few points. He pulled through like a champion though. In his own words, "The Chinese will eat everything but the table and chairs."

6.     6. Tianzifang – Now, after lunch I personally felt disgusting so I could only imagine how Chong Hong felt. We all needed to walk around a bit so we headed to Tianzifang, which is a sort of artsy market area with lots of shops and cafés. It was fun to look around but really disappointing because they had lots of fun food but we were too full to even think about it.

7.     7. The French Concession – Chong Hong had to go, so Lauren and I continued onwards to the French Concession, a fancier area of the city with a large European influence. We saw some cool buildings, almost got shot in front of the US Embassy for trying to take a picture – you know, the usual. There wasn't all that much to see, although we stumbled into the Shanghai Library and popped in quickly before heading back to our hotel.

8.     8. Sweet, sweet exercise – As I mentioned, we felt gross. Luckily, Lauren has her gym here in Shanghai (since she's lived here before) and we wanted to meet up with her friends who worked there anyway, so we headed to that area to go for a run. Lauren's super cool, so she spent most of the time watching me run while she conversed with her many gym rat friends in rapid Chinese – some "exercise," am I right? It was greeeeeeeeeeat to run though. Regardless, we ended up getting free water, using of one of the fancy rooms in the gym for part of our workout, and making plans for tomorrow night (which I hope involve karaoke), so I was okay with it.

9.     9. Warrmarr – Unclear what the Chinese actually is, but that's what it sounds like. Yep, we went to Walmart, if only briefly, because Lauren's friends who work at the gym are the people you hate in whatever city you live in who are trying to hand you fliers to join one thing or another. After Lauren said her hellos we popped in to the store itself briefly to see what sorts of excitement it offered. Some highlights: Lauren's water bottle had to be taped and sealed in a bag before we were allowed in, free samples, and condoms that were labeled "jean" at the checkout. Curious.

10  10. Yang's Famous Dumplings  - Dinner. Delicious. Famous for a reason. How did we get there? We asked someone where we could get said dumplings (they're on the list) and they pointed us down this unlit, super sketchy alley. The whole way through I was whispering "we're going to get murdered" under my breath (aka saying it fairly loudly) but we made it and Yang's was well worth the potential death.

11   11. The Bund (night) – Much more exciting. We now have pictures in the same location with the same clothes (I promise we showered after we exercised) on at different times of day. Loves it.

12   12. Dessert – McFlurry - it was like...oreo and caramel and everything good about the world. Not sorry.

We're off to bed! Tomorrow we're hoping to hit the rest of the "must-sees" in Shanghai, because before long I'll have to say goodbye! (I hope you caught the rhyme I was going for.)

Delayed due to lack of internet: Annie’s Life Lessons

Today was the official day of touring. We woke up at an astounding 9 o'clock since we didn't have to be ready to go until 10. Our day began with a bamboo rafting trip – "real bamboo, not fake like for tourists" – down one of the rivers that runs along the beautiful Yangshuo scenery. Although I was initially unsure whether or not the driver was going to talk to us at all, he ended up being super charismatic and fun. He made us stop all along the river and took a ton of pictures for us. It was like being rowed through a painting, with brief and somewhat annoying interjections from people trying to sell you things. I guess I shouldn't complain though, since we ended up buying from two of the vendors. From the first, we got a picture – you know, classic souvenir picture. It's great. From the second, we bought some fresh fish! The guy who was selling it was the worst, but I must admit, it was pretty tasty. Overall, it was a relaxing trip and a great way to end our adventure in Yangshuo – I think we spent the perfect amount of time there. It's pretty tiny and I think we hit all of the highlights, thanks to ABA getting it done like she always does.

After our not-so-white water rafting (although there were a few drops here and there!) we boarded the Golden Dragon for the hour and half drive back to Guilin. Now, if we had an average tour guide, this could have been like any mundane drive, but not with ABA. She used the time to instill her wisdom upon us. First, she told us the driver's life story (because she misinterpreted a question Lauren had asked her). She would ask the driver about a detail of his life, then turn around, tell it to us, and then tell us why he had made the wrong choices. Once she had finished tearing down all of the driver's accomplishments she told us some life lessons: 1. Stay at same job for 5, 6 years. Don't change jobs like the driver. Get to know the manager. 2.Get a good education. Find good job. Don't be doctor – I think it's good job but then I think you have to see sick people all day. Ew. That would make your face change. 3. Be busy, but don't be too busy. I think economics, banking, you too busy. We have a Chinese phrase for busy – it means "heart dead." After imparting her wisdom, she wanted to know more about us. Once she found out Lauren is Jewish she got really excited and told her how Jews are the smartest people in the world. We somehow got to talking about World War II, and she told us how she thinks Hitler started disliking Jews because, you know, they're all rich, and when he was young, he was shining a Jew's shoes and the Jew bit him. You're right, Annie. That was probably it. Once we moved on from Lauren's heritage to mine, she was equally as excited. When I told her part of my family came from Italy she exclaimed "That explains it!" When I asked her what she meant, she explained that all of her Italian tour groups love food, and want to try all of the weird, local stuff like the snake wine. Normally, Americans are disgusted by it, so she figures it must be the Italian in me that wanted to try it. Over the rest of the ride, we continued to learn about her opinions and about ourselves – by the time we got back to Guilin we had a lot to think about over lunch.

We went to the restaurant where Hilary and Chelsea Clinton had eaten while Bill was making that speech in the park we went to a few days ago. (Apparently they were too hungry to attend the speech themselves?) The highlight was definitely the soup – which was a mix of green tea and chicken soup, and somehow in the shape of a yin yang. Delightful.

After lunch, we went to a nearby Chinese bank to try to help the driver exchange his American dollars another tour group had given him for yuan, because he said they wouldn't take them when he tried. We felt we were invincible with our passports – we figured that since we're actually Americans, it would somehow make them suspect us less of counterfeiting American money. It turns out that logic was not foolproof as they didn't accept the money from us either. They said it wasn't good enough; it "looked too old." I have never heard of something like that happening ever, anywhere. Luckily, I had a few American dollars in my wallet which they accepted, so we were able to help him out, but really China? I was pretty vocal in my disbelief – so much so that I think the banker understood what I was saying even though she didn't speak any English.

We had the afternoon to ourselves. Being back where we were just a few days before, we did what any logical person would do. We went and took more pictures in the photobooth. It was a great life decision. The woman running it recognized us (we're regulars now) and even laminated these ones for free. They're equally as hilarious as the last ones, and we had just as much fun. It was a great way to spend some time. On our walk back to our hotel, however, we realized how this day had been particularly sedentary between the boat ride and the long drive. We decided to go for a nice, long walk so as to not feel like we belong to the super fat. We explored some new areas, and eventually Lauren found a massage place she wanted to go to. As I mentioned before, I have promised to allow people to touch my feet in Shanghai but they are mine alone until then, so I bid her adieu, walked around a bit more, and headed back to the hotel to attempt to get the wifi to work for a few minutes. (No success.) Around 8:20, I headed out to the Waterfall hotel. As we had never made it there two days ago, I was careful to not miss the "show" again. I didn't quite know what to expect and it started off like any other show involving water – with a bunch of little fountains spraying up water to music – same old, same old. ..until, the coolest thing happened. When they say waterfall show, they mean it. Tons and tons of water started pouring over the entire hotel from the top. I turns out that this hotel is in the Guinness Book of World Records for running the biggest artificial waterfall ever. It was fun to watch, and Lauren even caught the tail end of it after her massage ended. I got a few pictures and videos – hopefully they came out well, but I fear it will be tough to capture the immensity of it.

Newly rejuvenated, we hit the streets once more, in search of a little something to eat. We each got a mussel in garlic and split some rice balls with pork in them. Both good and cheap. We washed it down with a delicious, delicious Crème Puff. Don't judge us – we basically had to as they're on the food list and we hadn't hit it yet. Sadly, time is running out. The bright side of this, however, is the fact that we're off to Shanghai tomorrow! It's the city to which every city thus far has been compared to. I certainly hope it lives up to all I've heard about it. I wish Annie were coming along, but I'm sure she'll offer us some parting words that will serve as all the guidance we'll need! 

Delayed due to lack of internet: Winning in Yangshuo

We're officially obsessed with ABA. She led us on some awesome adventures through Yongshuo today, and she's even started joking with us. She has this hilarious and maniacal little chuckle every time she does something she thinks is funny, which I'm a big fan of. I also love her stories – they're long and involved and I often miss the point, but she doesn't care and will just plow on through and then look at you expectantly. I love her go-to catch phrases – "it's-okay," and "that's for tourists." Most importantly, I love all of the cool things she set up for us today.

Our day began in Guilin. We took a river boat cruise down here to Yangshuo, a super small and beautiful city where we're spending the night. I wish Annie had told us to bring cards or something, because as much as the views were beautiful, I'm sorry to say that it got a bit redundant after four hours. Lauren was being boring and slept for awhile, and Annie was really overeager about going on the top floor of the boat and taking pictures, so I have acquired an unnecessary amount of solo shots from today. We did manage to rouse Lauren for the "top highlight, number one scenery" – we actually saw the scene that is depicted on the back of a 20 yuan bill which was pretty cool  (although I'd value the view a bit higher personally.)

After taking what seemed to be an excessively long time to park the boat, we got off and walked to our hotel. We meandered through a large open market. Even though it was drizzling a bit, we were scheduled to go for a bike ride through the country side and were still excited to go. (Some of you might be aware that biking is not at the top of my list of skills, but I'm pretty good when it comes to leisurely, low-pressure riding.) When we got to our hotel and settled in, ABA told us we had 15 minutes to relax (since she's all business) and that she would meet us down in the lobby to go get our bikes since it the rain wasn't "that big."

Lauren and I each got lovely pink bikes and after adjusting the seats, we set off. In order to get to the country side we had to bike through the city, which is where my internal monologue about how imminent my death was began. It pretty much continued running for the duration of the ride. If you recall, traffic from the inside of a car is scary – take away the metal box protecting you and it's downright petrifying. Obviously, ABA was flying through traffic – a bus came within literally 6 inches of her and she didn't flinch. I thought it would be better once we were off the main roads, but it might have actually been worse, considering there were cars, buses, and trucks going in both directions on a street that was clearly wide enough for only a small car going in one direction. Lauren and ABA seemed unfazed, however, and once I got over the crippling fear of death (and by got over, I mean released my anxiety through gripping my handlebars as hard as humanly possible to give me a false sense of security), I was able to appreciate the incredible scenery we were riding through. I wasn't able to take many pictures because it was raining (aka I was terrified), but we did get one good one proving that we went. It was a beautiful ride and actually a lot of fun. It felt good to move around, and it was a great way to see what Yangshuo has to offer outside of the immediate vicinity of our hotel in the short time we have here.

The highlight of our ride was definitely the stop we made to these old farmers who live in the only original, old style home that live in the area. Two couples live there – a pair of brothers and their wives. They're super old and totally hilarious. They're apparently descendents of a great general in the Qing dynasty. As soon as we entered their house they offered us peanuts picked freshly from their personal farm. They were delicious. They offered us oranges too, but the most exciting things they had were definitely all of their homemade wines. Now, these were not your normal rice wines. There was one that was in a vat of gigantic centipedes, one in a vat of some littler bugs, and one in a vat of poisonous snakes with a giant centipede or two on top for good luck. I asked the man (via Lauren since there was obviously a language barrier) if he actually drank the wines and he demonstrated that he drank a little of the snake wine each day to make him strong. (Annie later explained that the wine helps prevent rheumatoid arthritis. "You eva see snake with rheumatoid arthritis?" Love her.) He then gave a fist pump of success because of how strong he was. Then the best thing ever happened – he offered Lauren and I some snake wine to try. UM, YES PLEASE! (Lauren could not be more disgusted and promised she'd take a picture of me trying it.) He offered me a half shot (explaining that it's very strong and that this is more than enough) and there is a video of me tasting it. That stuff was not wine – it tasted like straight alcohol and was tough to sip politely. I also might die of snake poisoning, but at least I won't have rheumatoid arthritis? Right now however, I feel like a champion. Before heading out, he had his pet birds do flips for us. I wish I had taken a video, but he counted to ten – first in English (his English is on the same level as my Chinese…we probably should have talked about Math and we would have been golden), and then in Chinese – and the birds literally did backflips. How great does this guy sound? ABA knows how to pick 'em.

After our visit with the cool, old people, we continued our ride and somehow made it back to the hotel alive. ABA, being the best, had arranged for us to go see the famous Yangshuo play that takes place on a floating stage. She told us she'd meet us back in the lobby in a few hours. It's unclear how she spent that time as she went back to Guilin tonight (even though she later told us "many tour guides wanted to share a room with me), but I'm sure it was something productive ( since you know how ABA is). Lauren and I headed down the main street to check out the shopping situation. We bought a couple of super cheap and great things, and then obviously were due for a meal. (Typical super fats.) We tried our best to find a restaurant with local fare, and settled on one with an adorable little girl running around. We ended up getting snails (we tried lots of weird things today), some veggies, and the famous local dish – Li River Beer fish. We even got some local beer to go with it. (Lauren was feeling wild.) The snails were surprisingly delicious, and the fish was incredibly fresh…as in the owner of the restaurant literally picked it up out of the tank next door and then cooked it. It was delicious.

After dinner we got ready for the show. We weren't really sure what to expect, and in the ride over, Annie tried to give us a brief summary of what was happening. Obviously, we still had no idea what she was talking about when she finished but we nodded because that's what she wanted us to do. The theater was entirely outside, and it was raining a bit but they provided ponchos. It was actually one of the most interesting shows I've ever seen. The stage was literally in and around the open water and surrounding mountains. Now, I have no idea what was going on, but Annie explained that it was an abstract show and everything gets something different out of it. I took some pictures / videos but don't think either came out particularly well, so I'll provide you with my commentary on what was happening and it you'll have to accept it because you have no other choice.

We open with 5 people who introduce the show. They talked about where they were from (according to Lauren), but I like to think about them like the singing ladies at the start of Hercules. I believe that they gave us a little background (in song form, obviously) to what was about to happen. They introduce our star-crossed lovers, etc. They left and then we meet our main lady. She's all sorts of lonely, just hanging out in a boat by herself. I think she's rich. She just wants love, you know? She sings about it, blah, blah, and then we cut to a scene of everyday life in the village. There's major sexual tension between the girls who were sort of annoyingly shrill when they sang, and the men who were chanting. Also, they were holding fire. I decided that they were displeased with our original lady because she chose to love a commoner, but they actually didn't seem angry at all so the fire might have just been to throw us off. Then we cut to the farmers – this was the coolest part of the show. I can't describe it at all, so instead I'll just continue to make up an unreasonable storyline. The farmers all fall hopelessly in love with our girl, but she's already found love (in a hopeless place). Then there's a cow. (Seriously. Why buy a cow for just one scene?) We're then looking up into the night sky, presumably from the perspective of our lonely lady. Our farmers have now become stars and there's a moon in the middle of the ocean. Then a naked lady's on top of it. She wasn't actually naked, but ABA said when they first opened the show in 2003 she was, but it was too distracting so now she's just in a nude-colored body suit. I have no comments on why that might have happened. Luckily, in the next scene our lovers get married. YAY! Then, the last scene fast forwarded 1000 years and everybody was robots. Fin. Hope that clarified things for you.

After it was over, Annie made some power moves getting us out of there. She had pre-arranged the taxi for us before we went in because she's a forward thinker like that. When we got back we wondered around the market a bit more (it was really big) and got a glass of tea before heading back to the hotel. I got a glass of honey melon milk tea, because I was all about trying weird things today. Pretty good – worth my 2 bucks. Now we're settled in the hotel watching some unreasonable Chinese TV, featuring a show in which orphans perform in a talent show…? So many questions about this country. Luckily, we have ABA for one more day, and she'll likely have a long, involved, and intricately imaginative answer for each and every one.