Monday, February 11, 2013

Puerto Rico? Perfecto.


                I had originally started my blog with the intention of tracking all of the cool/interesting/terrible/random places I would be going over the course of the coming years as a consultant. To be honest, I had aspirations of being as funny as “In the Exit Row”…and yet, here I sit, more than six months in(!!) without a post to speak of. I wasn’t truly inspired (except for maybe that time I went to Arkansas just for the novelty effect) until this week, when I had the opportunity to travel to San Juan, Puerto Rico for work!
                I know, right? It’s kind of the ultimate opportunity, especially in January. Although what was supposed to be six people for “at least two weeks” devolved into three of us for one, I somehow found myself landing at SJU (after a first-class flight, mind you) early Monday afternoon. It was a beautiful thing, since work didn’t even start until Tuesday. I lounged by the pool for an hour or so until my colleagues (aren’t I such a real person? I have colleagues now.) arrived and settled in. Once we were finally able to communicate with each other (Puerto Rico might possibly be the only place in the world that AT&T puts Verizon completely to shame when it comes to service), we decided to go on the best type of adventure – one for food and the beach.

Not a bad first day on the job, right?

                The roads of Puerto Rico leave a lot to be desired. Sometimes two-way streets turn into one-way streets that had a nasty habit of ending up in the direction opposite of that which you’re going, traffic signals are taken mostly as suggestions, exits are not clearly marked (if they’re even marked at all), etc. Needless to say, I wasn’t looking to volunteer to drive. Luckily one of the boys decided (and/or we forced him via never volunteering) to take on the burden and we made it through the day (and the week!) totally unscathed.
                As we meandered the streets of San Juan/the beginnings of Old San Juan, our desire to see the beach quickly gave way to our desire to eat as all of realized that it had been a relatively foodless day. We went to Punto de Visto (a restaurant right by where the many, many, many cruise ships stop) and got ourselves the Puerto Rican specialty, Mofongo. (I had heard of it because I checked with my resident tour guide, Robyn, who had thankfully been to PR before.) It essentially seemed like a bowl composed of fried plantains filled with shrimp (although you could fill it with other things as well) and covered in one of a couple of different sauces (I went with the tomato-y one that is the traditional choice). Sticking with the local theme, we got some Bacardi mojitos to go with it. (Two for one special – how could we go wrong?) I went with a Watermelon one because I’m a genius. It tasted like candy, or possibly happiness.
                Obviously, now that we all (or at least I) had giant food babies as a result of our ridiculous(ly delicious) meal, we thought it wise to go to the beach. We got there right before sunset – it was at the beach that I first truly realized how beautiful this island is. The number of  pictures I took on my iphone (I know, I know…I should’ve brought my real camera BUT I had a suitcase with two weeks worth of stuff already so don’t judge me) definitely affirms this, though I may have been a bit aggressive in the quantity. (It’s gotta be in the hundreds.) Regardless, we relaxed in the water, felt adequately guilty that the other three people were stuck in the 19 degree Arkansas weather, got over it, took more pictures, and headed back to the hotel to get ready for the quickly approaching work day.

The boys were instagram-ing this SO hard.

                We headed to work bright and early the next morning, sat in a windowless room and left after sunset. (Okay, I’m probably making it sound a bit worse than it really was because it’s hard to draw the sympathy card when you’re working from Puerto Rico.) We got lunch at a shack across the street that literally had a menu which consisted of two items: chicken tacos and meat tacos. Their liquor repository on the other hand had pretty much everything you could think of. I was pretty unsurprised. The tacos were sooo good and met my expectations exactly. After work, we headed back to the hotel where my colleagues made me feel bad about myself for not working out that morning (I promise I’ve become a “morning workout” person…we just had to get up so early in Puerto Rico), so I went to the gym. Afterwards, I totally ruined anything I’d gained from the workout by going to a Brazilian steakhouse (Texas de Brazil?) for dinner. It was fine but I’m not sure I’d go back.
Definitely a reasonable proportion of bottles to meal choices. I have no qualms.
                The next day was pretty much the same, with the key differences being around food. (It should come as no surprise that this entry is to focus largely around food, since I’m alllll about a good meal.) For lunch, we were looking for a little American flair so we found the nearest Starbucks and headed to the mall. We got typical food court stuff for lunch (although I think I threw “Mr. Sandwich” off by ordering a salad as it became an ordeal which took excessively long), and then headed to Starbucks. The real highlight of our mall adventure was navigating back to the car. We had chosen the wrong row (these things happen) and to get to our car, we had one of two options: walk all the way around or cut across via a hill that had to be at an 80 degree incline. Obviously the rest of the team chose the incline, and because I’m a healthy combination of not bright and stubborn, I thought I’d follow suit…in heels. (Okay, wedges. But STILL.) I was focusing about 90% of my brain power on not falling and dying (no small feat, mind you) when suddenly I heard a cacophony of noise. It seemed the group of ladies getting into the car right after the edge of the hill had a lot of feelings about my descent. (I’m feeling like I need to clear this up –by hill I mean the entire experience lasted like 13 seconds. I’m not sorry for the build-up because the emotional rollercoaster I endured was totally real.) They were at once trying to express their fear for my safety, their anger at the rest of the team for not helping me, their encouragement, and I’m pretty sure their surprise at my ineptitude as a human being for thinking this was a good idea…don’t worry, you guys. I’m fine. We headed back for an uneventful afternoon.
                After work, we headed into Old San Juan for dinner. Old San Juan is the type of area I love to spend my time in – old, cobblestone streets, historic sites, super kitschy tourist shops, locals trying to sell you things – it’s the dream. We decided to go to Raices, a restaurant someone had heard of/got good reviews on Yelp. (Note: Yelp works in Puerto Rico and it’s awesome.) This also led to some interesting social situations. It is first of the place where I confirmed that no one who actually speaks Spanish thinks that I have the capacity to speak Spanish. Our waitress talked to everyone else at the table in Spanish, gave me a once-over, and went for English. This happened all over. Rude, Puerto Rico. Just rude. I expressed this when she was within earshot, and then she gave my pity-Spanish for the rest of the night. (She’d say something in Spanish and then look at me sadly, as though waiting for me to ask her what it meant.) I made the excellent call of ordering a mojito which came in a glass I got to keep (and I didn’t even have to steal it) and a salmon for dinner, which was really good. More interesting than the meal though, was the fact the two girls from my high school who I haven’t talked to since high school sat down literally at the table next to us. What is my life? I should have said hi, but didn’t get the chance. SORRY FOR BEING THE WORST. Anyway, I was still pretty entertained that it happened. We walked around Old San Juan for a bit and headed up the El Moro, the famous fort. They were setting up for the famous street festival of San Sebastian, which was beginning the next day though, so we were unable to drive all the way. We walked up and around, but couldn’t see all that much at night.
                The next day, I had to head out for just a night. I ran a recruiting event at Duke with two other recent graduates who work at my firm and while I was thrilled to be back to campus, I was pretty bummed that I was missing out on San Sebastian, and flying into a pretty heavy snow storm. I was pretty ill-prepared for the weather and the fact that there was a taxi-line, but otherwise, it was nice to be back. I got to have breakfast with Anne and the event went really well!
                Unfortunately, I was unable to get a very early flight back to PR, but I did get upgraded again, so I didn’t have too much to complain about. I got into the hotel at about 1230 the following morning, and while I knew the boys were out and about at the street fair, I could just hear my parents telling me that it was a horrible, horrible idea to go find them, so I decided against it. (You’re welcome, parents.) Although I missed out on the fun, I made myself feel better by deciding to wake up early and get some exploring in while the whole of Old San Juan recovered.
                I got to the city with the help of my awesome taxi driver who gave me some helpful tips and was just generally very nice. If you ever need a ride, I have his business card and could hook you up. When I arrived at about 830, it truly seemed like everyone was in recovery mode – most of the stores were closed, and very few people were around. I took a walk along the water then decided to head up to El Moro to see it in the daylight. While en route, a couple of touristy shops opened up, so I popped into a couple and ultimately decided to buy a few stupid things (including, of course, a Christmas ornament) from the first one I’d gone to. (Typical.)
                I made it up to El Moro by about 10:30 – I was planning to take a free shuttle my taxi driver had told me about, but it didn’t arrive instantaneously at my whim so I quickly lost patience and decided to walk. I wandered a bit, took some pictures, and even requested someone take a solo shot of me! (This is very not my style, but it felt necessary.) I didn’t have too much time though, because we were heading to an island off the coast, Vieques on a flight leaving at 1PM.

#soloshot #sorryimnotsorry

El Moro, in all it's glor-o! (That's gotta be the Spanish for glory, right?)

                I made my way back down, and stumbled into the heart of the fair. While I’m sure it was very different in the day time, there were all sorts of stands selling every food you can imagine, beer, beer, and more beer, and locally made jewelry and art. I casually ran into a parade of sorts which involved masks that were laughably big as well as some singing, dancing and clapping. I admired/clapped for a little then continued on my trek. My colleagues had switched hotels for the night, so were staying right in the city. I brought them some Starbucks to help them rally because I’m a wonderful person, and we prepared to head to the airport. I was getting a little stressed out for time because I like to be at the airport fairly early, but they assured me we would be fine. It turns out that the “airport” is walkable from our hotel and literally a one-room building. There were no boarding passes, there was no security – heck, there wasn’t even a loudspeaker. They asked me how much I weigh so they could balance out the plane, and I ended up sitting behind the pilot who I made pose for a picture before take-off. It was a 30 minute flight and it was incredible. We snagged some awesome pictures and touched down at a bigger, but still pretty pathetic (aka awesome) airport. We picked up our rental jeep (not quite a wrangler, but still moderately rugged) and headed to our hotel, the Hacienda Tamarindo in Esperanza (along roads that were not quite wide enough for two cars but were all two-way streets nonetheless. Sometimes wild horses would just walk along the road, not caring at all that you’re there.)

Nope, this isn't our gate. THIS IS THE ENTIRE AIRPORT.

That's a thing I rode in.

Who says you're not allowed in the cockpit? He was excited - in his own words "It's windy out. This is gunna be fun."

Psh? No phones during flights? As if.



View from the Hacienda (aka my future residence)

There was some debate as to whether we should stay at the W Retreat and Spa (since we’re all about Starwoods) or a more local, homey place. Luckily, we decided to go with the latter. I’m obsessed with our hotel and think I want to live there. We arrived and got a personal tour of the hotel and amenities from the only person working there at the time. Everything at the hotel is on the honor system, which I think is pretty reflective of the island. They don’t really keep track of what you do, but if you drink from the bar, just write down what you had; if you use chairs/beach towel/cooler, just bring them back; if you buy sunscreen or bug spray, just write it down. It was very cool. It was beautiful – pretty much every window you would look out of or balcony you would sit at required many pictures to be taken. We settled down and headed to “Blue beach”, a favorite of the locals. Along the way, we stopped at a food truck along the downtown strip and got some fried conch, which were incredible. The beach was perfect – sun, sand, drinks and ocean. 
You know it's gunna be good when it's endorsed by a painting of Homer Simpson.

I don't think anyone's ever felt blue at Blue Beach.
We hung out there for a few hours and then headed back into town to prepare for our bioluminescent bay tour, something the island is famous for. The bay seems to light up because of the dinoflagellate plankton which give off light when they’re disturbed – (SWE does an activity about it for FEMMES. You should totally check out our website and learn more about it.) It was very neat, especially since I somehow finagled my way into doing no work during the kayak tour. (We were a group of three and I snagged the middle seat.) We headed back to the hotel after the tour and prepared for dinner. My one complaint about this otherwise awesome hotel is that there’s no conditioner. (First world problems?) I somehow managed to struggle through though, and off to dinner we went, to El Quenepo. The restaurant we ate at was definitely my favorite of the trip. I actually wanted everything on the menu. I ended up getting some beef over pasta with spices, peppers, and all good things. It was deeeeeelicious. After closing the restaurant down, we walked along the “downtown strip” of beach-shack bars to go see how Vieques spends its Saturday nights.

Sunset waiting for our tour van to come pick us up

                We settled on “Lazy Jack’s” bar since it seemed to have the vibe we were going for. We got a truly local experience, since one of my colleagues is notorious for chatting up any and everybody and he did just that. We ended up going to a bonfire on one of the nearby beaches which was definitely an interesting experience…
Oh, you know. Just a casual evening out.
                Although we got back sort of late, we still wanted to make the most out of the next day/take advantage of the free breakfast at the hotel. After picking up the car and wandering around a bit (which definitely concluded with me trespassing on private property…oops), I did my best to make sure everyone was rallied before the 10AM deadline. After enjoying some eggs, we tried to decide how to spend our last day. We wanted to try out paddle boarding and tried a few places with no luck. As we were driving downtown, however, we saw that the “fun brothers” shack offered paddle boards. There were only two, but we got them and some snorkel gear. They paddled and I swam out to one of the nearby (like, very nearby) islands. (So this is an island off the coast of an island which is off of the coast of an island which is off the coast of the states – it’s essentially Inception.) I was feeling like a champion until I was climbing around the rocks and noticed they were covered in sea urchins, at which point I became (perhaps irrationally) paralyzed with fear. It was cool though, with the help of some people we met, I was able to navigate my way to the paddle board and give it a try. I was more surprised than perhaps I should have been, but let’s just say I don’t think I have a future in it. At one point, a boat came over and asked if I needed to be saved. I think they were offended when I said I was fine. (“We watched you going backwards for awhile...”) Whatever. I’m going to blame the current? (It was flat and there was hardly any wind, but you weren’t there so you don’t know that.) Anyway, once I finally made it to the “beach” part of the island, I had the chance to do some snorkeling. The fish I saw by the coast were much cooler than those I had seen on my swim over (aka one lonely fish and a single Medalla light can). We paddled (okay, I swam) back, took some pictures (photo op!), and headed back to the hotel. 


No, it's fine. I wasn't trying to drive here anyway. You do you.

Ignoring the above commentary, I look like I could totally paddleboard, right? RIGHT?
We said our last goodbyes and left to go check out what we were missing at the W…frankly, not too much. It was fine (it was really nice), but it had none of the local charm and was set up such that you would never leave so you wouldn’t really get any of the true Vieques spirit. We got to the airport with a solid 15 minutes to spare (so at this airport, we were probably early), and headed out right around sunset. We snagged some good pictures (obvi), landed, and walked back to our hotel just in time to catch the end of the 49ers game. We watched the game over a light dinner at one of the restaurants right at the hotel that was pretty mediocre. We checked in for the night, and while I was excited to have been upgraded to my awesome executive suite, I was kind of bummed that I was only there for a single night!

Today was sad. We worked until about 2 then headed to the airport. We got to our gate with just minutes to spare, and are currently en route to Chicago (and then to Arkansas). When the pilot announced Chicago’s current 9 degree weather at the beginning of the flight there was an audible groan from the entire plane. That pretty much sums up my feelings about leaving this beautiful place – I hope I have the chance to go somewhere else as exciting soon! 

Saturday, June 30, 2012

Vienna: Life on the Danube


We got into Vienna two days ago early in the afternoon. We were debating between taking a taxi from the train station and braving the subway – I’m glad we ended up doing the former because it was a fairly long ride and the subway would have been hot and moderately confusing with all of our luggage. Great life decisions.

We got to our hotel room and found we were just about as close as one could be to the Danube without actually being in it. It was a great view, but since we were spoiled with our Buda-ful view at the last hotel, we weren’t overly awed. We did a quick check-out of the Exec Lounge to get a lay of the land, – again, it had nothing on the first one – grabbed some maps and information (unfortunately we came the day after the last Spanish horse show which Vienna is famous for), and went to go explore Vienna.

Now, the Hilton Vienna Danube, while in a beautiful location, is not near the city center. Being even as ambitious as we are, we could not reasonably walk all the way to where all of the “excitement” is from the hotel. In fact, the sights themselves are sort of spread out. We invested in a 48 hr subway ticket and definitely made use out of it. We probably could have gotten away with not paying though. It was similar to the Munich and Italian subway systems in that you didn’t have to swipe anything to get in, but we weren’t feeling wild so we didn’t take the chance. (No one ever ended up checking, but the “what if” factor made us feel like we made a solid choice.)

We needed to get some lunch (gotta have those priorities in line) and so we decided (since we could go wherever we wanted) to go check out the area by the university since we figured college kids really like to eat. (I was using myself as the example here.) We essentially picked the first restaurant that we saw, but it was really good! (It was called something like Rainman café.) I got a Turkey Salad with some yogurt sauce – there seemed to be a lot of Mediterranean food around – and as I said, I was very happy with it. Our waiter seemed like less of an Al (Bundy, of course) than we’d experienced in Hungary, so we were feeling pretty good about Vienna already. While Sean and Dad finished their beers, Mom and I walked down the road to do a bit of shopping. She got a good deal on a cute scarf, so it’s safe to say we enjoyed our time at the university.

We saw an incredibly impressive looking church right across the street, and even though Mom and Sean were a bit church-ed out (it tends to happen in Europe), I persuaded them to step inside because it was the most famous church in Vienna, St. Stephen’s! (There’s some repetition when it comes to church names since we saw one of these in Budapest. This one lacked the hand.) We got up to the front door to find a sign that said we had come during the only hour during the day when it was closed. We turned around, annoyed at our poor timing, only to find that the girls standing behind us were giving us a strange look. They stepped around us and went straight inside…none of us thought to try the door. Who knew? We went inside and enjoyed the beauty, only to realize that it was not in fact the famous church I thought it was. Oops. The family could probably use more culture though, so I had no qualms about the mistake.

Once I oriented myself on the map (no small feat considering the size of the city), I found that we would save ourselves time and energy (and get the full value of our 11,80 ticket!) if we took the subway to Stephansplatz and the town center. We arrived and saw the actual famous church. It was pretty impressive and there was even an opportunity to climb to the top! Since we’ve developed an affinity for narrow, uneven stairs in the past week, it was a no-brainer – up we climbed! This climb, however, as opposed to our last several, was not only narrow, but also tightly spiraled. It was a struggle to say the least – Mom was freaking out (typical), but the rest of us were struggling a bit, too. Although it was difficult, we were happy to find that anyone else we encountered also seemed to be having a hard time. I mean, we weren’t happy in a sadistic sort of way, but rather in a “we’re glad that our exhaustion was not purely a fat American phenomenon” sort of way. We were frankly a bit disappointed when we (finally) got to the top since we couldn’t even go outside. There were some windows, and I got some “I survived St. Stephen’s climb” shots (because not everyone did – we passed some Europeans at the 80% percent mark who just didn’t think those last 50 steps were worth it), but overall, I would say it was fine just viewing St. Stephen’s from the floor, thank you.

We left the church and continued heading along my walking tour. (My faith in NatGeo has been largely restored.) We walked down the famous shopping street – it was pretty whatever – and found the stores I had randomly googled which sounded interesting. The first, labeled as an “arts and crafts” stores, was essentially a fancy art gallery that was well out of our price range, and the second, an antiques store, was essentially a picker’s (as in, American Pickers – watch if you don’t already) paradise. We saw a couple of cool things but didn’t end up getting anything. (We didn’t have quite the same historical knowledge and bargaining power as the pickers on TV.)

We continued along my tour until we hit Kapuzinerkiche, a 17th century church with a bunch of Habsburg graves in it. They were surprisingly cool to see, mostly because of how ornate they were. It was also pretty cool in there, which was also a big plus, as Vienna was (and this train back to Praha is) excessively hot. We left the church wondering where they’re going to put the future Habsburgs as the most recent relative died last year and there’s only one slot left. All that thinking got me in the mood for a snack (let’s be honest, I’m always in the mood for a snack) and as we were right near the famous Hotel Sacher (the original creator of the famous Viennese Sacher-torte – they’re also obviously famous for their ability to create original and interesting names), we thought we’d take a walk over to see what was going on. I was under the impression that we would be able to sit on the roof. The first person we asked was very adamant in his “NO.” It turned out that this was because we were actually next door to the hotel and not even at the right restaurant. Unfortunately, once we made our way around the bend and double checked the name to ensure we were in the right place, we heard that the roof was still not a viable option.

We were bummed, but not defeated. Always (well, sometimes) equipped with a backup plan, one of my walking tours suggested a delicious ice cream shop. We made our way to Zanoni Gelateria and each got a delicious, cold dish. I wish I had one now since it’s so damn hot on this train. I got Nutella, nougat, and stracciatella – sooo good.

We meandered back to the hotel and hung out in the lounge while taking turns to shower and get ready for dinner. Dad made a friend – his (awesome) Duke shirt drew the attention of a father who was visiting his daughter studying abroad in Vienna. It turned out he had mistaken Duke blue for Kentucky blue, but he was very nice and would always talk to us when we saw him. We make friends everywhere we go. Actually, the initial exchange occurred while I was in the shower; when I returned I was ready for dinner. Earlier in the day, I had talked to the woman at the lounge about Danube Island as a possible option. She made it sound like a solid plan. While Dad was socializing (social butterfly that he is), Mom asked a different person, however, she said “No. This is not a place for you.” As Mom was offended that the lady meant that it was not for her because it was for crazy young people, she became pretty determined to go. Danube Island is exactly what it sounds like – it’s an island in the middle of the Danube. Hope that’s clear. Regardless, we set off on the subway. We got a really late start (long showers were perhaps a bad idea), and so we didn’t get to the island until about 9:30. We got out of the subway station, only to find…nothing? Sure, there were groups of questionable youths drinking and (likely) doing other illegal things in circles strewn across the grounds, but the restaurants and bars the concierge and internet promised were nowhere to be found. Dad was displeased, but Mom and I were still pretty sure we could somehow make this work. Soon though, we were pretty set on going back to town when Mom stopped a couple who appeared out of the freaking bushes where all of the fun was. It turned out everything was across the river on the other side, but the thought of having to come back to this train station late at night was unappealing enough to send us back into town.

We went to the area we were in during the afternoon only to find everything to be closed. Apparently the Viennese are not the same as the Spanish who eat super late. We walked from restaurant to restaurant and eventually made out way back to the Hotel Sacher, as it was literally the only place open. We were resigned to the fact that we couldn’t sit on the roof and settled for sitting under the awning outside. Sean and I got some Wiener Schnitzer (classic) and Mom and Dad got some Goulash Soup. It was fine, but to be fair anything would have been fine at that point. The beauty of eating at Hotel Sacher is that we now had no reasonable excuse as to why we shouldn’t get the Sacher-torte. We did, and it was great. There was some raspberry in it which I figured would be a deal breaker but it actually added a bit to the cake. Let’s not get it twisted – I will not be having raspberry in any future cakes, but in this particular case, I let it slide. Fully satisfied, we made the trek back to the Danube to turn in for the night.

We only had one full day in Vienna so I wanted to make the most of it. We started off moderately early and headed to the Schonbrunn Castle. According to the concierge it was the castle to see, but if it was anything like the island, I wasn’t so sure I wanted to see it. Luckily, we took the trip – it was great and well worth the long(ish) subway ride. We got to the castle and were not sure whether or not to be excited or not about the accompanying audioguide. Luckily, it turned out to be appropriately timed and actually pretty interesting. A tidbit: Sisi was an anorexic bitch. Her husband doted on her and just because she had to get married at 15 and had no say as to her choice of husband or anything else in her life, she was resentful. She would also often miss meals so as to keep her slim figure. Whatever, Sisi. Another tidbit: there’s a painting of someone’s wedding with Mozart in it even though he wasn’t really there. He wasn’t famous at the time that this wedding took place in real life, but was when the painting reconstructing the event was made. Cute. I hope people start painting me into portraits when I get famous.

After the museum we headed out to check out the gardens. They were large and in charge with a giant fountain in the middle. As I mentioned, it was hooooooooot out so I really had an urge to jump in the fountain but I didn’t think it was worth the risk of being kicked out of the castle and possibly the country for so I somehow held back. We were all fading fast – luckily, right in front of the zoo (which claimed to house pandas, koalas, elephants and more!) there was an oasis in the form of a café with umbrellas. We settled in for a refreshing afternoon drink. I got this citrus beer that tasted just like the Tinto de Verano from Parque Retiro in Madrid, so I was a happy camper. We got ourselves re-excited about spending an afternoon traveling around in this heat and made our way back to the subway for the rest of our Viennese adventure.

On our way to the subway we stopped to admire some artwork that seemed pretty original and unique. I don’t really know how to describe what it looked like, but as this story will end with us each buying one, please come to my future apartment (which I will hopefully find next week…) to see what I’m talking about. We talked to the guy about his paintings, which he apparently made with spray paint, and learned that each one takes about two days to make. I got one with a little dude who reminds me of Charlie Chaplin on it – I was torn between him and a rose, but I decided Charlie had more character. Also, I had fallen in love with his quirky little figure in the spotlight, about to turn around and wow his audience, so I couldn’t leave him behind…and the rose somehow seemed to classy for a first real apartment. Mom and Dad got some lovey-dovey couple, and Sean got a cool, jazzy guitar player. We tried to barter to no avail, but I think the 10 euro we each spent were well worth it. I’m fairly certain that now that I think this is unique I’m going to see them on every corner in New York, but at least I’ll know that mine’s from Vienna – it will still make me feel cool.

We made it back to the center of town and headed to the famous (according to NatGeo) Café Demel. It’s known for its pastries and coffee. As we entered there was a full-sized wedding dress cake. This is the stuff of Cake Boss! The room where the make the cakes was encased in glass so that you could watch. It was a little uncomfortable, but also a little like TV. I got a quiche for lunch which was incredible, Mom got some gazpacho which I assume was disgusting because gazpacho’s the worst but she assures me it was great, and Sean got the Goulash. We had to get dessert so I got an Iced Coffee with Bailey’s which was delish. Sean got some crepes which were fine but not extraordinary, and Dad got an Iced Hot Chocolate with Bailey’s. Feeling rejuvenated, we continued on our way. As I previously mentioned, I felt the family was a bit under-cultured, so we headed over to the only remaining apartment of the many Mozart had lived in during his life. This was his biggest and most ornate and he only lived there for two years. The ticket again included an audioguide, but this time the guide was reeeeeeeally long and unnecessarily detailed. Although it was fun to learn about all of Mozart’s gambling debts and womanizing tendencies, a mere sentence about them would have been nice. It got into such minute detail that had I decided to listen I could have heard Mozart reacting to reactions in Vienna and Prague of people who had seen the Marriage of Figaro for the first time. It was overall interesting to see and I’m glad we went, but I could have done with a condensed guide. (I’m sure you’re all thinking that you feel the same way about my blog. I’m a hypocrite. Deal with it.)

After the Mozarthaus, we thought we’d see the famous Ankeruhr (a clock from the early 1900s) and Hoher Mark (an old square)t before heading back to the hotel. The Ankeruhr is “considered to be one of the finest art nouvea monuments in Vienna. Instead of hands, the Ankeruhr shows the time by means of 12 figures representing famous Viennese historical personalities.” I wish we had been there at the top of the hour to see the figures change but it was still a pretty impressive sight. After figuring out how it worked (sort of), we headed back to the hotel, determined to make it out for dinner earlier.

We went to a different stop for dinner, where our taxi driver had said there’s a lot of good restaurants. As we were all pretty hungry and tired, we decided to go to the restaurant right across the street from the train exit we’d chosen. Although Mom was initially nervous as we were the only people in the entire restaurant, it turned out to be one of our favorite meals! Our waiter was very nice and told us all about his upcoming trip to Washington D.C. I got the turkey schnitzel which was nearly as good as the corn flake covered schnitzel I had in Prague, Mom got a sandwich which seemed good, and Dad and Sean got some sort of beef dish. We met the big boss who was an old woman who was very kind and set out on our way. Mom was feeling decadent and wanted some dessert. As evidenced by the embarrassing number of references to food in this blog, I am never one to say no to sweets, or any food in general.

We were a mere 2 subway stops away from a famous coffee shop, Landtmann’s, so we headed there to check it out. I got another awesome coffee drink, – dark chocolate and caramel iced cappuchino or something – Sean got his fancy Viennese coffee, and Mom got some hazelnut and vanilla ice cream. It was deeeeeelicious. The boys went out and sat by the river at the hotel when we got back. Mom and I packed up and relaxed.

We had one more half day in Vienna before heading back to Prague to wrap up our trip. As I had failed at finding a great flea market in Budapest (sad times), I did my best to find something comparable in Vienna. Vienna has a famous Nachtmarkt every day which sells all sorts of fruits, vegetables, nuts, and other foods, but on the weekends, other vendors come and it becomes a sort of free-for-all flea market, called the Flohmarkt. We made our way over at a reasonable time and made our way through the market. We saw your standard scarves and shot glasses, and even found a great Christmas ornament (we were getting down to the wire and I was getting worried), but didn’t see anything all that extraordinary…that is, until we crossed over to the next street and found ourselves in what seemed like a gigantic, collaborative garage sale. There were all sorts of junk and some treasures too. We had a great time looking through some crazy old memorabilia – Sean found some old Nazi identification papers, we saw some really old toys, we saw all sorts of old jewelry – and even got a couple of truly unique things. Sean and I got some neat, old beersteins, and Dad got some street signs from the 1930s. Overall, it was well worth the trek.

On our way back to the hotel, we stopped at Café Museum for lunch. It had come up on my list of “best coffee houses in Vienna.” We were surprised to find that they literally had the same exact menu as the restaurant we’d gone to for dessert the night before. We were strangely okay with it, but I started to question whether my list was a big conspiracy. Mom and I got grilled chicken salads that were great, and Sean had a ham and cheese sandwich with homemade chips which he really enjoyed. We made it back to the hotel, packed up for good, and took a taxi to the stiflingly hot train station. We were aggressively early so we spent a delirious hour trying not to melt looking forward to the A/C on the train. We got on to find that it’s not much better than outside even though the ticket guy assured us “it’s on full working.” I’m upset that our vacation’s coming to an end, but I must admit that I’m pretty excited to turn the A/C to full blast as soon as we get to airport hotel we’re spending the night at before heading out tomorrow. Overall, I think we’ve all had a wonderful time abroad. It’s been a very busy 10 days but we’ve had a lot of fun. We’ve seen a lot of what there is to see, enjoyed some good meals and drinks, and loved spending some extended time together as a family (most of the time)! Plus, the closer we get to the end of our busy vacation, the closer we get to what I’m sure will be an incredible plane ride home that will be just the relaxing vacation I need before getting back to real life. 

Auf wiedersehen! 

Gooood-a in Buda, and the Best of Pest


We’ve just boarded our train to Vienna after a busy few days in Buda and Pest. They’re actually two separate cities and Pest is pronounced “Pesh.” Clearly, we learned a lot while we were there.

After a 7 hour train ride from Praha, we jumped into a taxi to drive up the Hilton Budapest. We were a little bummed out because it was raining, but luckily I had just purchased a cute, new raincoat before we left so it wasn’t too much of a catastrophe. We were surprised to find that our hotel was up a gigantic hill. (I think they should rename the hotel the Hill-ton but that’s just me.) I mean, there were stairs cutting through the middle but it sort of seemed like we were going to waste most of the short time we had in these cities trekking up and down it. Once we got to our rooms though, we definitely saw the perks of being atop a baby mountain – the view was incredible, even in the rainy weather. We were looking out right across the river at the famous Parliament building. I must have literally 1000 pictures of the view from every angle in Buda, and while none of them could quite capture the beauty of looking at it in really life, there has to be at least one that comes fairly close.

We dropped off our stuff and decided to head out for some lunch, as we were all pretty hungry from a busy day of doing nothing on the train. We had made some friends on the train, or rather, some people came into the compartment car we were sitting in on the train and kicked Dad out because they had three of the six seats reserved, and then they started talking to us. They gave us a bunch of advice and recommendations, a piece of which was that Buda is much more expensive and residential and made Pest sound overall like the place to be. Once we had seen our view, we were pretty sure they were wrong, plus we were dissuaded from making the journey to the center of the cities because of the rain, so we settled for a restaurant right near the hotel, even though it might cost a little more money.

I got a Hungarian fish soup, allegedly made from fish out the Danube. It was pretty good, but it had skin on it which I try to avoid so it was a bit of a challenge to navigate. We paired our food with the local Hungarian beer, Dreher, which was actually very good. In fact, Mom herself was a big fan, something which rarely happens when it comes to beer. It was at lunch where we had our first of many experiences with Hungarian service. Now, it might be because we’re Americans, or a cultural thing, or just that we encountered a few people who shouldn’t have ended up in the service industry, but some of our waiters we not at all personable. Dad began referring to these waiters as Als (after Al Bundy), which I have a feeling would have made them even grumpier had they gotten the reference.

Nothing perks up my spirit like a good meal and some beer, so I was rejuvenated and inspired to explore a bit, even with the crummy weather. We walked around the Buda area and made our way towards the beautiful National Gallery, which houses a lot of 19th and 20th century Hungarian art inside. The building was once the famous Buda castle. It seemed the perfect museum day, but obviously it’s closed on Mondays. Typical. Anyway, the benefit of walking around on a day with a drizzle is that there are no other tourists around trying to take pictures in front of the monuments and buildings and views you want pictures of and with. Since I had brought my camera along (you never know when a Kodak moment is going to sneak up on you!), we got some great photos in the rain. The rain even stopped as we were taking pictures, and what’s more, we found two alternative routes down to the bridge! Things were looking up. The original stairs cutting down one side of the hill, as recommended by our taxi driver headed back down to the white bridge – I really liked that all of the bridges connecting Buda and Pest were different from each other – which didn’t seem to be all that pedestrian friendly, implying that we would still have to walk all the way back around to the Chain Bridge (with its clearly defined pedestrian/bike path) to get across. This sounded arduous. During our rain exploration we discovered a pathway that led right to the Chain Bridge and a cable car that did the same! Great success.

Feeling better and better as the day wore on, we retired back to the Hilton to check out the Executive Lounge. Now, this hotel seemed fancier in almost all respects than the Hilton Prauge Old Town, so we weren’t totally sure what to expect. Frankly, I liked the first Exec Lounge better. I felt slightly underdressed as it was filled with actual business people doing actual business, and it didn’t even have any normal water – the still water was flavored so it tasted like flat seltzer aka the worst. Although some of the staff was very helpful (they gave us dinner recommendations the first night), we also felt they were reeeeal judgy over the fact that we came to the lounge after getting back from a day of adventuring, before heading out for dinner, and after eating…okay, perhaps it was excessive, but still.

They recommended a restaurant called 21 for dinner, conveniently located right down the street. As we wanted to save Pest for the next day anyway, this seemed a great choice. I ordered a rosé because I was feeling fancy. I was very surprised, and somewhat torn as to whether or not to drink it, when it arrived and the glass had “Chapel Hill” painted onto it. Strange, but true. I ordered a chicken crepe in some sort of sauce which was delicious. In attempting to figure out the menu, we started talking to the people sitting next to us. It turned out that a young man and his grandfather were on a twelve day trip driving from place to place – it was a tradition they had for some time and seemed adorable and fun. Although Grandpa was a little hard of hearing, he was very nice. The younger guy did something in computers so he and Sean had a lot to talk about, and Grandpa started talking to Mom about his life, wife, and how he could persuade his grandson to cut his hair – he thought the long locks on a 27 year old probably gave off the wrong impression, and he was probably right because the grandson was really nice and smart, etc. – and Dad was talking some about business, some about healthcare, and all sorts of other random things. I didn’t have a lot to contribute to most of the topics so I spent most of the meal deciding whether or not I had judged the grandson because of his hair (I had), and whether or not I had changed that opinion nearly immediately when I realized he was British (also true). I also tried to figure out how people could make one little glass of rosé last the entirety of a meal and made a mental note to start sneaking water in with me in my purse. The biggest highlight was likely the bit I overheard about how there was allegedly some old King’s mummified hand from the 15th century in one of the churches. I was hoping we would stumble upon it during our stay – maybe we would even run into these new friends there since it was something the grandson was hoping to take Grandpa to see. Overall, it was a great meal.

We turned in for an early night, eager to get a good start the next morning. I had my walking tours to guide us, but had a bit more difficulty navigating the map the hotel had given us as there were no English translations of the landmarks. We made our way down our newly discovered path. After making only one wrong turn, we found ourselves in front of the Chain Bridge. We were impressed with how quickly the Danube flowed as we crossed over No Man’s Land between Buda and Pest. After successfully making it to the other side, and nearly being run over more than once when crossing the street, we decided to head straight to the impressive Parliament building we’d been admiring from our windows (using only appropriately marked crosswalks). I taught my mini history lessons about the statues surrounding the building to no one as the rest of the family meandered through with no particular direction or knowledge of who was who. (I guess they felt my two to three sentence blurb about each of them wouldn’t have done much to clarify.) We found our way to the back of a line and got into it. As a recent college graduate I know that whenever you see a line, it’s best to get in it and send a scout out to figure out what it’s for rather than waste your time figuring it out before holding a spot. It turns out it was the line to purchase tickets for the tour. The next tour wasn’t starting until 12 and it was only about 1030, so we stepped off (the now much longer) line and promised to come back the next day to see it. (Never made it back – oops.)

I had one more Pest tour from NatGeo, but I was yet unable to locate any of the landmarks from it on our map, so we instead tried to follow the advice of our train friends and head towards the famous “Vaci Utca.” Vaci Utca is a pedestrian street filled with a bunch of shops, restaurants, and bars, and as we were feeling a bit lacking in the shopping department we thought this was a great way to start off our afternoon. On our way to Vaci, we stumbled upon St. Stephen’s Basilica, only to realize that this is the church with the hand in it! Dreams really do come true. We stepped inside and had a look around. It had incredibly high ceilings and was truly beautiful. The hand on the other hand (HAHA), was pretty whatever. You couldn’t really see it. To add to the disappointment, we didn’t even run into Gramps there! Sad times. Luckily, we were able to go to the top (via elevator, woo!) and check out a panoramic view of Budapest. It was pretty windy but very impressive.

We made our way to Vaci Utca to find that it was mostly stores like H&M and Zara and Mango. Don’t get me wrong, I love all of those stores (actually, Mango I could do without), but we were hoping for something a little more…Hungarian. It was a beautiful street though and we stopped to find something for lunch. We actually ended up at an Italian restaurant and got some pizza and beer. The pizza was actually really good. We had another Al Bundy waiter, so we didn’t think he was a great person to ask about our course of action for the rest of the day. We spent lunch making a gameplan and had decided on a general itinerary for next day. We headed back to Buda for the afternoon, taking the cable car up. Mom was not excited about it, but Sean, Dad, and I found it to be pretty cool. We went to the National Gallery which housed some pretty neat exhibits. We somehow got into the temporary modern art exhibit even though we didn’t have a ticket for it – I’m glad we did as it was likely my favorite part of the museum. The one piece I didn’t get (okay, I didn’t get a lot of them, but the one piece I really didn’t get) was literally a giant piece of rock. Perhaps the artist is saying Hungary Rocks? Unclear.

My goal for the afternoon was to go to Ruszworm, a famous pastry shop and coffee house that was right around the corner from the hotel that had been around since 1827. We stopped back in the lounge to plan dinner and the next morning, but made sure to head back out before my beloved pastry shop closed. (This is why I belong to the super fat – see entries on China for more details on my pending obesity.) Dad got some homemade ice cream, I got a crème puff, and Sean got some deceptive chocolate cake that had some stowaway fruit hiding in it. Everything (except for the weird fruit) was incredible!  Mom weirdly didn’t feel like a pre-dinner dessert was appropriate so she meandered around and looked at some of the local touristy souvenir shops. We had wanted to swing by the St. Matthias church that was literally next door to the hotel, but it was closed by the time we got back. I have no regrets about my choice. We took a gander at the catacombs under the hotel (it was built around the remains of a 12th or 13th century church) and then got ourselves ready for dinner.

We decided we wanted to do dinner on the Danube, and so we headed to the Columbus boat to enjoy a meal out on the river. We were overlooking the bridge, gallery, and Parliament, and were there right at sunset, so we really couldn’t have asked for anything better! The only downside was that there were some spiders hanging out on the railing right next to my chair, so I sometimes had trouble maintaining my focus on anything else. The food was incredible. Mom and I split a spring vegetables salad with feta cheese and bacon and a hake fish in some sort of sauce with shrimp and potatoes. Sooooo good. Sean got feta and red pepper stuffed chicken with rice and Dad got some beef in a pepper sauce. It was a great meal all around! Feeling fully stuffed, we made our way back up the hill and to bed.

Yesterday was our last full day in Budapest, and armed with my maps and guides, I intended to make it a full one. We had researched some flea markets – Budapest is apparently known for them – and found one the coincided with the end of one of my walking tours. Could it be more perfect? We also found where the New York Café was on the map, and the famous Turkish baths. They conveniently made a sort of rectangle starting at the Chain Bridge, so it seemed pretty doable. We walked down Andrassy Ut, the super fancy street of Pest. We saw the “Broadway district,” some fancy stores, the famous Opera House, and more! Our walk ended in Hero’s Square, which is essentially what it sounds like – a big square filled with statues of National Heroes. Behind the square is City Park, which had a couple of key points we wanted to hit – a castle, and the flea market. We wandered around and found some stands but were really disappointed. It just didn’t seem like a “flea market.” We looked up the market one more time, only to discover that it’s only there on weekends. Bummer #1. We then made our way to the castle, diligently following the signs, only to find that we were, in fact, going towards the agriculture museum that happened to be housed in something that looks like a castle. Bummer #2. I was feeling like a failure (a feeling which I reeeeeeeeeally don’t like) as we headed out of the park and back on our way to civilization. (We were off the map at this point.) Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted something familiar – it was the logo of my future company! We walked over and found the Budapest office, so the walk seemed worth it after all. Dad and I took some pictures in front of it as in just a few weeks we will officially (once again, since I interned there last summer) be colleagues there.

Feeling good again, we started heading towards the New York Café. I know what you’ve been thinking since the first time you read the name – really? New York Café? You’re from New York. Get a little cultural competence, will you? This place, however, was recommended by our well-traveled friends on the train, as well as by our taxi driver, and it was even labeled as a must see on Mom’s map that she’d acquired from a random person trying to persuade her to take a tour or something, so we thought it would be a good stop to make. We were getting really hungry on our way, and since the Café is really known for its coffee, we decided to stop for lunch first and then head to the café later for a drink. As we were a bit off the beaten path, we were having some trouble finding something to eat. Once we found a restaurant with an outdoor patio we were happy with, we realized it was a Mexican restaurant! Leave it to the Pages to find one in Budapest. I don’t think we’ve ever been on vacation without getting Mexican, and I’m glad that we didn’t break tradition here.

We excitedly sat down and decided what to order to drink. Since even Mom wanted beer, we decided to be economical and go for the “beer giraffe.” Sean and Dad thought it was a typo but I stand by my thought that it was no misnomer – it was one of those beer towers and I think it bears a resemblance to a giraffe’s neck more than anything else. We got a lot of double- and triple-takes from people passing by on the street. I think we really upheld the American image of drinking in large quantities at somewhat inappropriate times. Regardless, we also ordered some tacos which were a little weird but actually pretty good, and continued on our way.

It turned out that the ornate, self-proclaimed “Most Beautiful Café in the World” was a mere 15 minute walk away, so we perused some nearby stores before settling in for coffee at New York Café. It was in the lobby of some fancy hotel and I really don’t think they were exaggerating with the aforementioned claim. It had painted ceilings, beautiful chandeliers, pretty chairs and everything else you can imagine. When I say we got “coffee,” I mean we got dessert that had a hint of coffee in it. Dad and I got Iced Coffee with Crème Brulee flavor and Vanilla Ice Cream, Mom got the same without the flavor, and Sean got a Moroccan coffee. My fullness was irrelevant as this was innnnnncredible. I’m so glad we went and wish they actually had a New York Café in New York.

Our next and final stop of the afternoon was the famous Turkish Baths. I had clearly labeled them on my map and we got to the location only to find that they weren’t there. It turns out my source (Mom’s random map from the guy) or my transferring abilities fell far short, as the baths were back in the park where we first started. I was saooooooooooooooo mad. In fact, I’m mad just thinking about it right now. The lesson here is always triple check. Bummer #3.I brooded for a little, but didn’t let it bring me down for too long.

We headed back up to Buda to do some souvenir shopping (since we had no flea market) and see some other remains (you know, your classic 13th and 14th century church remains, etc.). We had a drink in the famous Fisherman’s Bastion, overlooking the bridge and Parliament and found a place for dinner. We didn’t find anything particularly great in the souvenir department, which was a letdown but we realized (when we were about the pay the bill for dinner) that they only accepted cash so we ended up being able to get rid of our remaining Hungarian bills anyway.

We watched a bit of the Spain vs. Portugal game (viva España!), but got a little bored after 70 min of 0-0 so Sean and I found this weird Hungarian show that seems to be about a fat piece of Cinnamon Toast Crunch who’s caught in a white abyss of nothingness attempting to get to some lounge. We’re pretty sure it’s propaganda, but we’re not sure what for. We went to bed pretty early so we could catch the train we’re currently on to Vienna. It’s nicer than our last train – they’ve already given us a free Kit Kat – so we’re pretty sure it’s going to be an easy ride. Although it’s sad that we’re already headed towards the last leg of our journey, I can’t wait to see what Vienna has in store for us! 

Monday, June 25, 2012

Pages Perusing Pra-ha-ha


Okay, I admit the title’s weak, but aren’t alliterations alluring? (See what I did there?) My (in)ability to come up with jarring titles aside, Prague was incredible. We’re currently on our 7 hour train ride (first class, suuuuuuup) to Budapest and I thought it was the perfect time to reflect on our adventures thus far.

First of all, and perhaps most importantly, I don’t think I’m ever going to be able to settle for non-business class travel again. When I say the plane ride itself was a vacation, I am not hyperbolizing. We were served champagne immediately upon being seated, and enjoyed sipping it as we watched the peons shuffle sadly through to their small seats in the back. I’m usually on the other side of this interaction and in the past have truly felt like a member of the proletariat, but as I sipped my champagne and lounged back in my oversized chair, I began to understand the allure of the bourgeois life. (I thought I’d pepper in some words having to do with European history to make readers believe I’m sophisticated enough to be seating in such a seat as I was.) Once we took off, things only got better. Actually, to be fair, there was a small blip – Mom’s TV wasn’t working. I felt bad as it was definitely my fault since I perpetually have bad luck with these things (like that time I went to Madrid or that time I went to China), but we hardly even noticed since the seats lounged back nearly entirely horizontally so sleeping was a legitimate option. We enjoyed our delicious and classy meal, complete with free drinks and desserts, and then laid back to try to get some sleep. Just kidding, we slept like babies until breakfast. It was the best. After a delicious breakfast, I had just enough time to review my information about Prague before we landed.

From the airport, we had to find our way to the hotel. Being in charge of transportation and lodging (“my responsibility ended when I booked the train tickets”), Dad had our bus all figured out. Likely Prague’s parallel of Triangle Transit, the Airport Express was hardly as glamorous as it sounded. It was hot and it was packed. The upside was that we were able to snag a seat, but the downside was that as a result, we ended up with people’s butts in our faces. We made a game-time decision to get off at a different stop than intended, and luckily, as opposed to that time I tried that in Ireland, it worked out perfectly.

We checked in at the Hilton Old Town Prague with no problems and headed up to check out our rooms. We were on the “executive floor” which meant we had access to the swanky executive lounge. I enjoy a swanky lounge as much as the next gal, so, after dropping off our bags, we went to go explore. As we relaxed over some complementary snacks and drinks, we decided that this was a place we would be spending a lot of time. Dad had acquired a map, on which I drew in all of my walking tours (love NatGeo.) We were conveniently located right outside of Old Town, mere steps from the beginning of my first tour. We changed out of our plane clothes and began tour number one.


Sadly, the family was not as interested in my informed commentary on all of our stops as I was, but at least they were willing to follow my path. We started at the Municipal House (a concert hall), and walk under the Powder Tower to officially enter into old town. We headed down to the square and began to truly feel the “old town charm.” It was cobblestoned and had an impressive-looking clock tower in the center, with a big church (Church of Our Lady Before Tyne) across the way. We decided to climb up the clock tower (the first of many stairs we would tackle) to get a better view. After snapping a few pictures (I’m all about Kodak moments), we headed back down 10 minutes to the hour.


According to my walking tour (which I treated like our Bible), the astronomical clock which strikes on the hour is a pretty impressive spectacle to watch. As it was close, we decided to find our spot among the people lining up to see, and Czech out (my jokes get better and better, don’t they? And more original!) what all the fuss was over. Mom and Sean were getting antsy and didn’t want to stay, but as the clock struck 3 we were all happy to be there. There was a fun little skeleton guy who rang the bell as various religious figures poked their heads out of the upper window to wave hello. There were a bunch of mechanisms on the clock which changed, and to top it off, and (real) guy with a trumpet popped out of the top to play us a little tune when the mechanical stuff ended.

Happy to have checked it off of our list so early in our Prague adventure, we meandered through the square to find ourselves some lunch. We found ourselves a nice little restaurant, and settled in for a quick bite. We quickly discovered that soda and beer cost the same amount, and all decided to go for the latter except for Mom. Mom’s soda came out with no ice (as is the norm around here). She politely asked for some more only to have the waitress touch the glass and affirm “what? It’s cold,” before glaring at her and going to get some ice from the back. I was a little nervous she was going to spit in our food, but everything came out looking tasty. I got an asparagus soup which I really enjoyed. The food seems to be pretty cheaply priced here, which makes sense as it’s 20 czech korums to one USD.

After recovering from the ice incident, we continued our trek to the famous Charles Bridge. We had all heard about it, but until you see it yourself, it’s pretty difficult to understand how magnificent it is. It’s a pedestrian bridge with giant statues lining its edges overlooking a beautiful river. We crossed over and found ourselves right near the Kafka museum and decided to see what it had to offer. I have personally only read a couple of his stories so felt a little underprepared but was excited nonetheless. Right outside the museum we stumbled upon a fun statue of two guys peeing into the pool in which they were standing (complete with full hip rotation!) As we were chuckling over the statue (because we’re immature Americans who have no appreciation for deeper meanings), we conveniently overheard a small tour coming through who happened to be speaking English. Apparently the two guys represent government officials and the pool they’re peeing into is shaped like the Czech Republic. So deep. 


Tee-hee

Feeling more sophisticated already, we headed into the museum to continue to expand our cultural knowledge. It was really cool – a large part of the museum was essentially physical representations of some of the crazy ideas in Kafka’s stories (i.e. an office that seems never to end). I wish I had studied up beforehand, but equipped with my photos, I’ll now have better mental images should I ever decide to read more Kafka.

By this point, it was getting to be dinner time, so we stopped at a beautiful bar on the river for a beer and then headed back to the hotel. We went back to the Executive Lounge (as I mentioned, it would soon become our second home) before dinner. The staff in the lounge was incredible. They were all super helpful and made dinner reservations on our behalf every night. (We would walk into restaurants be like “We, uh…have reservations under…room…816?”) The first night we headed around the block to this cool looking restaurant called Celnice (which was a little confusing because the street was also called Celnice) which was definitely a converted something, but we couldn’t tell what. Mom opted for the salad (boring), but Dad, Sean, and I got a couple of things to split – a cheese plate, cornflake covered turkey schnitzel, and some duck. It should come as no surprise that the cornflake covered schnitzel was quite obviously the best. You could actually really taste the flavor of the cornflakes. I loved it. Mom asked for water, which, as per usual in Europe, implied bottled rather than tap water and again, cost as much as the beer. She really was not making great H2O decisions on Day One, but luckily she learned from her mistakes. The lesson of course, is that one should always opt for beer. After topping off the meal with a delicious dessert (cheesecake covered in Bailey’s anyone?) and heading back to the Executive Lounge one last time, we turned in for a good night’s sleep.

The next morning, we were feeling pretty ambitious and were hoping to combine and complete my two remaining walking tours into one mega-tour. Guess where we went for breakfast? The staff at the lounge in the morning was just as helpful (and perky) as in the evening; the highlight was likely when the somewhat overeager staff member running the lounge in the morning was clarifying Sean’s request for water. “Still?” he asked, referring to the fact that Sean might want carbonated water instead. Sean gave him a look and answered “yea” in a somewhat annoyed tone, asserting the idea that his mind had not changed from ten seconds prior and he did still want water. We truly couldn’t be classier if we tried.

As I mentioned, we had big plans to see gardens and the castle and more, so we rallied and made our way out of the hotel. We decided to make our way over a different bridge so that we could see the Charles and the river all at once and snag some awesome pictures. We crossed a place which dropped us off conveniently around where Walking Tour #2 began. It was mostly gardens so we decided to pick a couple that sounded intriguing and hit those. We started with the one my tour told me was the Palace Garden, only to find that it was the Wallenstein Garden, which the tour told me was on the other side of the street and down a ways. WHY WOULD YOU LIE TO ME NATGEO? I TRUSTED YOU. Clearly, I was a bit distraught over the fact that the thing I had printed off of the internet for free was not 100% correct, but somehow we trudged on. The Wallenstein Gardens were actually really neat, and surrounded the building which is now used for Congress. We came out and headed towards the palace.



Classy Congress

We picked up the first walking tour where we had left off yesterday, in the Lesser Quarter Square. Although a seemingly rude name, it did seem sort of appropriate when one compared this square with the excitement and beauty of Old Town Square. It wasn’t even a pedestrian square – we were subjected to the mercy of the little green man. In Prague, the little green man who indicates it’s appropriate to cross is accompanied by a nerve-wracking, quick-paced clicking noise. It lasts for a short time, and my heartbeat tends to accelerate to keep up with the clicks so I found myself sprinting across in a nervous hurry. Personal neuroses aside, the highlight of the square was definitely St. Nicholas Church. Our love affair with stairs continued as we made the trek up to the top to take a look out to see some impressive, panoramic views of the city. Interestingly, the church also seconded as a spy station for the secret police, so we got to climb further up to the top to see some old spy gear and see where the spies would live and work. Overall, it was pretty cool.



On our way back down we discovered Mom’s ineptitude when it comes to lots of spiral stairs. To be fair, even though she’s scared, she’s willing and able to do them, but we were waiting a solid ten minutes for her at the bottom. I had enough time to figure out how best to get to the palace. We headed down Nerudova, “one of the handsomest streets in the Lesser Quarter,” to stop for a quick bite before climbing up to the castle. We popped into souvenir shops along the way but were overall pretty unimpressed. Mom and I split a spinach and cheese crepe for lunch, and we all tried the local beer. We were commenting on the how cool all of the glasses we’ve seen were, and Dad asked the waitress where we could buy ones like it. She said they get them directly from the brewery and they couldn’t sell them so Dad (somewhat) jokingly asked if he could steal one. She said something to the effect of “I won’t be looking” so we took that as implicit permission to snag one of the awesome glasses. Feeling like champs, we headed up to the Palace for a royal afternoon.

A long flight of stairs led us to the main gate of the castle. My disenchantment with the tours continued when I discovered there was a ramp we could have walked up instead nearby, but at least we were at the right place. We conveniently arrived right at the time of the changing of the guard which was exciting to see. We entered through the main gate and found our way to the palace’s first attraction, St. Vitus Cathedral. It was gigantic and had beautiful stained glass windows. Mom went as far as to say it was prettier than Duke Chapel – I begged to differ, but I might be a little biased. After exploring that part of the cathedral you’re able to see for free, we headed into the main palace. We bought a combined ticket for the majority of the sights to be explored on the grounds and began, as I mentioned, with the Royal Palace itself. It was neat to see, but mostly for architecture of the rooms themselves since most of the furniture was no actually there. My favorite room was one that had all of the crests of the royal families painted on the walls. It made me want a crest of my own. I guess I’ll just have to marry into royalty, since they’re probably the only people who still keep track of such things…


I mean, I guess it’s fine.

Get at me if you have one.

After the palace we continued onto St. George’s Basilica. It was a lot less ornate than St. Vitus and much more solemn. It is apparently “one of the few Romanesque buildings in Prague still standing,” but who knows if I could even trust my walking tours anymore? Continuing on from the basilica, we made our way to the Golden Lane. This was the area where all of the servants and marksmen lived, so I was a little thrown off by the name. We climbed up some narrow stairs and walked down a hall filled with all sorts of cool, old armor. My favorite was the one I affectionately dubbed “birdman,” as it literally looked like armor for big bird (complete with bird face and feet). On our way down the hallway, we spotted a stand where you could “try out a crossbow.” Obviously, Sean was eager to partake. Playing with a crossbow sure draws a crowd. Lots of people gathered to see him shoot a bull’s-eye, right in the middle. He later said that it confirmed his theory that he would have made a great medieval knight; needless to say, the whole family and surrounding crowd were impressed. Having a knack for embarrassing myself in large crowds, Sean’s success persuaded me to give it a try. I was hoping great aim was somehow a family trait. Unfortunately, it was not. I think the crowd mostly stayed out of pity to watch me miss all three times, although a few probably stepped away for fear that I might shoot so far to the left that I’d end up facing backwards and hit them. I think a large part of the problem was that the crossbow was made for righties and so I couldn’t quite hold it up or line it up in a way that I could gauge where I was shooting. (Okay, maybe not a large part…but it was definitely a contributing factor.) It’s at least reassuring to know that had I lived in the Middle Ages I would have had a brother that could protect me since I clearly could not have protected myself.

Family Protector

“What do you mean this is small? This is bigger than my apt!” – Sean

Once I recovered from my monumental failure, we moved on to what I found to be one of the more interesting parts of the royal grounds – the dungeon. It was a place I would hope never to find myself. There were cages, chains hangings from the wall, and even a sort of bodysuit made of metal hanging over a fire. Apparently the dungeon was renamed after someone who had learned to play the violin while locked up somewhere in here; I assume in one of the aforementioned devices. Before seeing it, I wasn’t all that impressed about that feat, as with enough time anyone could become an expert at anything (10,000 hour rule, amiright?), but after seeing those conditions, I had a newfound appreciation for Mr. Dalibor of the 15th century.

We made meandered our way back down to the Lesser Quarter from the palace, and stopped for a beer before heading the see the famous Lennon Wall. I was excited to see the beautifully painted peace sign and surrounding lyrics that had popped up when I googled it, but frankly was pretty disappointed with the actual product. My mental picture had been spray painted over with gems like “SOANDSO WUZ HEREEEEEE AND IS SO ORIGINAL BECAUSE HE WRITES THINGZ LIKE IMAGINE WORLD PEACE FOREVER LOVE HEARTZ.” Maybe it wasn’t quite so bad, but I was still underwhelmed.


Whatever, Fred.

We headed back to the hotel via Kampa, a park from one of my walking tours. We found ourselves in the middle of some concert rife with dreadlocks, beer, a google plus tent, and advertisements for “rock for church.” Although I had some questions about how all of these things fit together, I was nonetheless excited about the event and the free wifi that came with it. We crossed another bridge and took a new route back to the hotel.
  
We obviously had happy hour at the exec lounge (I’m so comfortable there I feel I could abbreviate it now) and got another recommendation and reservation for dinner. We were excited for some real Czech food; Mom, Dad, and I got Goulash in a bread bowl. It was soooo good. As Dad is a meat and potatoes type of guy, I was pretty sure that Czech food was right up his alley and was definitely correct in this assumption. Dad and Sean tried the “national drink of Czech land,” some sort of ginger shot (it was gross), and Dad snagged the glass. We’re really terrible people, but I’m okay with it.


Meet Sophisticated Sean, the world’s new favorite meme.

Our goal for the night was to find a jazz club, something Prague is known for. We found one via the recommendation of the waiter at the restaurant, but Dad wasn’t thrilled so we decided to meander towards the river and find another one. We did and we enticed by the red and black walls and promise of some sort of non-traditional jazz, and so we sat down. What we got once the show started was essentially watching my grandmother tripping on drugs with pink hair…but in a good way, mostly. The band consisted of her, a pianist / mandolin player, bassist, and drummer. They were all incredibly talented and other than the occasional screaming and buzzing (unclear), it was pretty cool! Mom was pretty displeased with the first set and would sometimes lament about how we should have stayed at the first, more traditional place, however, she got really into it for the second set, and eventually even came around to the rest of the family’s conclusion that the woman on stage was in fact the Czech (and as I mentioned, somewhat high) version of her mother. We headed back to the hotel and (since the exec lounge was closed – we’re so fun that we stay out late) got a drink at the real hotel bar, eavesdropped on a conversation between a man and the 72 year old woman he was hitting on while her husband sat and played on his iPad.

Don’t let the pink hair fool you – she’s definitely over 70

As we had covered the walking tours, we decided to take a day trip on our last day in Prague. I was trying to find something fun to do and decided to look up where the brewery was for the delicious Czech beer that was everywhere, Pilsner Urquell was. It was mere hour and half train ride away! We had breakfast and then headed to the train station – it’s the same station we left out of this morning so it was a good practice run. The train ride went smoothly (in compartment cars, just like Florence except with fewer inappropriate Mi Scuzzi jokes) and we got to Plzen right around 11:45. As everything I saw online said the brewery is right in the city center, I didn’t bother to look up explicit directions on how to get there. This was probably a mistake as when we got out of the train station there was no obvious indication as to where the center of town was. Mom interrupted a police man in the process of writing someone up for a ticket and asked for directions. Luckily, she didn’t get shot and we were on our way. We followed what we thought were his directions and ended up at some abandoned bar…oops? Maybe that was his subtle way of telling us it’s inappropriate to interrupt. I started to get a little nervous when we continued wandering around and found everything was closed (as it was Sunday) so there was no one we could really ask. As we made our way back to the train station to see what was on the other side of it (getting closer and closer to the 1245 start time of the tour), we saw a hotel across the street and decided to ask there. Turns out we were just one street off and adorable little town was waiting for us right across the way!


Pleased to have made it to Plzen

We made it there in time for the tour and were met by our English-speaking guide, Tereza. She was nice, funny, and informative. What more could one want from a guide? It was reminiscent of when I toured the Guinness factory in Ireland, only this time we got to see the process actually happening rather than just learning about it. It was impressive to see – especially the production line for processing and bottling, and we even got to have a large glass of unfiltered Pilsner Urquell at the end. Next, we headed to the only restaurant in town for lunch. It’s interesting because it seems like the entire town was built around the brewery. Lunch was pretty good – I got broccoli in a cheese sauce with some bread, Sean got a bratwurst and Mom and Dad got some soups. We finished up, and then headed to the gift shop where we got a couple of exciting things before heading back to the train station.

As we relaxed in the lounge we tried to find a place for dinner. I wanted to go to a restaurant Elleana had recommended but it unfortunately closed pretty early so we weren’t going to make it. We went instead to a restaurant Mom’s friend’s cousin (all about networking) recommended. She actually recommended the rooftop part, so we booked that for dessert and ate inside for dinner. It was soooo good! Sean and I split a salmon dish and a shrimp dish, but Dad’s steak and Mom’s pasta were really tasty too. We had some time to kill between dinner and dessert so did one last walkthrough of the square. We got back to the restaurant about 15 minutes early but they took us anyway. The view was worth the wait. It looked out over the square on one side and the palace on the other. The dessert was phenomenal. (Ice cream – duh.) We heard the excited cheers of people watching the quarterfinal match of the Eurocup in the square, and took in some last views of Prague before heading back to the hotel. We’ve already had a wonderful trip, but I’m excited for our journey to continue in Budapest!