We belong to the super fat

Over the course of our time in Chengdu, we became very close with our tour guide, Cici. At least, we were close enough for her to feel comfortable calling us super fat. How did we get there? Let me explain.

We had spent the morning climbing the beautiful Mount Qingcheng. It was about an hour and a half drive away from our hotel, and we left extra early in the morning. On the drive over, we listened to a lot of T. Swift, and some gems that definitely have never been heard outside of our car or anywhere in the US as Cici had believed. They were the best. (If I had access to youtube, I would try to find them to share them with you. A teaser – "No amount of coffee, no amount of cryin', no amount of whiskey – no wine, no, nothing else will do, I've gotta have you you you you you, I've gotta have you." ) We learned about how the mountain was the birthplace of Taoism, as we walked up the first quarter or so of the mountain. People still live and farm in some parts of the mountain, so it is perhaps because of this that it wasn't so much a "hike" as a never ending set of uneven and odd-shaped stairs. We took a cable car up the middle chunk of the hill, which was a great life decision considering how annoying the stairs were. We did, however, climb the last quarter to the top. On our way we saw various temples – it was kind of cool because the monk would ring the gong when people prayed to let the gods know to be listening. Luckily, we didn't get too sidetracked and made it to the top. The peak offered some incredible views, as well as what I would assume is the most holy temple since it's closest to the gods. (Cici was not particularly clear on this nor much other information. Her purpose was to mostly be adorable and get us from place to place. We were fine with it. Actually, that's not entirely true. There were a ton of red ribbons tied around the tree and fence surrounding this temple which Cici informed us were people's prayers to be offered up since not everyone makes it to the top. Love her.)

We were impressed when we noticed the peak was full of a bunch of old people who had not taken the cable car but rather made the whole trek. Typical China though – we've definitely seen old people pushing their own wheelchairs before so this was not all that surprising. After taking some stellar pictures (including one with Cici herself!) we made our way back down and got ourselves all excited for lunch. Cici and Mr. Joe even joined us! We got some spicy tofu, kung pao chicken, awesome eggroll and beef somethings (it was like…an eggroll sandwich filled with delicious meat in a terrific sauce). We were talking to Cici about how China is sending us mixed signals between all of the delicious, cheap food and the incredibly skinny women. She informed us that Chengdu makes people fatter and fatter. When we questioned her logic (noting how skinny she is), she replied "I belong to the fat!" Let me be clear when I say Cici belongs to no such thing. Both by way of trying to console her and because we had all just shared in a large meal (of which Cici did eat a large portion), we told her that if she's fat we must be obese. She looks at us and replies "If I am fat, then in my city, you are super fat!" We started cracking up uncontrollably (mostly because even if we are super fat, we were killin' it going up that mountain and she was definitely struggling at some points), and she continued "don't ask me to go to hell, but it's true!!!!" We didn't stop laughing for a majority of the way to our next destination, and have since been referring to ourselves and others who we deem worthy super fat.

Our next stop was the Dujiangyan Irrigation System. It's been operating for more than 2000 years. Initially, I wasn't particularly excited to see it however it ended up being really impressive. We walked across this awesome rickety bridge to get to where the water splits with half going to Chengdu and half to one of the main rivers (the one that's not the yellow river. No idea what it's called. Oops.) We then walked along the river into this beautiful park. We opted to walk rather than take a bus because 1. We like walking and 2. We wanted to prove to Cici that we shouldn't belong to the super fat – maybe merely the regular fat. To be fair though, I was incredibly excited when I realized that we could exit the park at the other end and didn't have to walk all the way to the top where we began, so maybe the 'super' is necessary.

We had realized on our way home that the travel agency had not told Cici the correct flight information so when she dropped us off after the seeing the irrigation system we had to say our goodbyes! We were sad to see her go, but eager to continue our adventures.

The problem with not having a tour guide in a city you've never been to before that's not particularly known for anything other than what you've already seen however, is that you have find ways to entertain yourself. We took advantage of the lobby's free wifi and I "looked up things to do" (aka uploaded pictures to my blog). Eventually, we came across a list of top ten things to do in Chengdu, many of which we hadn't yet seen. We wrote down some of our top choices, and headed out to explore a bit and grab dinner. We stumbled through some random market and then decided on hot pot for dinner – an item on my food list! I'm going to be honest – I struggled in the chopstick department. Hot pot is essentially fondue – we had a spicy Sichuan broth and a less spicy typical broth in the middle of the table into which we poured and cooked various meats and veggies. How one is expected to find said items once they're submerged in the broth with chopsticks alone is beyond me. The waitress noticed my dismay and directed me to the ladle. We somehow also got free dessert, so Lauren picked us out some pumpkin…things. They were pretty good. At the end of the meal we were offered the receipt or a Sprite. I didn't really understand what was happening but Lauren went for the receipt. It turned out to be a solid decision as the receipt was actually some sort of scratch off and we won 5 yuan? Unclear, but definitely made our nights.

This morning, we had a leisurely morning and slept in until 8 o'clock. I know – we were feeling wild. We got a breakfast worthy of a super fat, and then headed out to try to find the 'top ten of Chengdu.' We started with a park that was about a 10 or 15 minute drvie away. It was beautiful, although the water in the lake was definitely not a color that seemed safe for swimming. We walked around for awhile and then decided to wander the streets. We stumbled into what was labeled a "curio art market" that ended up being a bunch of stands with people selling all sorts of random and exciting things. We found some goodies and then decided to try to hit item number two on our list – the Mao museum. We had an incredibly difficult time snagging a taxi and when we finally got one, he kicked us out because he didn't know where this museum was. Rude, and not a good sign. After desperately running (okay, walking casually) up, down, and across the street we got into taxi number 2 – sadly, it seemed the Mao museum just didn't exist. As it was approaching lunchtime, we instead asked him to take us somewhere good to eat…he literally drove us back to the park where we started. It was the first of many circles we made today.

Although bummed that we paid to backtrack, I didn't let it bring me down as the miscommunication had cost me less than a dollar. We obviously couldn't find the restaurant for awhile and ended up circling around a bunch of people playing Mahjong and watching us while sipping their tea for awhile but eventually made it. Lunch was alright – the dan dan bien noodles (the specialty noodles of the area) were really good, but overall the meal was not our best.

After eating, we again tried to brave a taxi. By this time we had given up on Mao (I'm convinced the museum doesn't exist), and decided to hit the next place on the list. The taxi driver brought us to the old street we'd been to two days before. We again showed him the street we wanted and he called it in to his company to see where it was. Lauren had gathered that they were responding and saying that it wasn't a shopping area as the article we read had claimed, but rather that it was a school. Clearly we could have done better finding a list. He then said he knew what we were talking to and drove us to an incredibly sketchy street. I was not looking to get out of the taxi, so I had Lauren instruct him to drove back the way he came because I had spotted something interesting on the street on our way over.

We circled back and ended up at a more high-end shopping area with a lot of jewelry and art stores. We walked around for awhile, taking full advantage of the free tea samples all of the tea houses were offering us as we walked by so that we didn't have to buy any water. Once we crossed through the shopping area we found ourselves back at the corner we had originally caught the taxi at. We were totally unsurprised. It was bound to happen considering the rest of our day. We decided to explore the area for awhile. The best thing that came out of the wandering we did for that hour and a half was that Lauren now officially has a ginger collection, i.e. she purchased more than one shirt that has a picture of a girl with red hair on it. Strange, but true. We started in this little boutique that had a bunch of fun shirts on sale. Unfortunately, being super fat, the only shirt that fit me in a particularly flattering way (not even according to just me – the lady working at the store agreed) said something that was somewhat incomprehensible – the only thing that was clear was JUSTIN BIEBER at the top. Not happening. Lauren made her purchase – a shirt was a hipster redhead on it – and we headed further down the street. We ended up in a more sketchy shop which was awesome because it had a shirt with a redhead with an excessive amount of freckles and pigtails. Obviously, I encouraged Lauren to buy it. Not exactly sure why, but she acquiesced. Thus, the collection was born. I, on the other hand, made an equally savvy purchase and bought a shirt with a zebra on it. I normally have a lot of buyer's remorse after a purchase, but this zebra has sent me nothing but good vibes so I'm feeling great about it.

We made our way back to the hotel and had about an hour to kill before Mr. Joe was due to pick us up to fly to Guilin. We went to go try one of the steamed buns Cici had recommended and they were pretty whatever – the ones we had in Beijing were much better. Then, we found ourselves in an adorable little coffee shop and got a vanilla and coffee flavor thing which turned out to be solid investment. We made it back to our hotel and waited around for Mr. Joe who ended up being 20 minutes late! Luckily, we made it to the airport with a ton of time to spare. We spent a lot of the flight speculating how our tour guide would be able to top Cici.

We got Annie. We haven't decided how we feel about her yet. She's older than Cici, and definitely more knowledgeable, which is good. She could be less fun though. We'll see how it goes. We got to the hotel safe and sound. Our hotels have definitely gotten worse in quality as the trip has gone on (especially when comparing to the Regent in Beijing which we pretended we were staying in), but even though the Eva Inn doesn't have a safe and had a rude policeman bring up our bags for us who told us our tip wasn't big enough, the A/C is doing a fantastic job, and it's in a great location, so we're happy. Annie's spoiling us – we're not leaving until 9 tomorrow –  so we're ready to get a good night's sleep and are excited to see Guilin tomorrow!